Things Mike Francesa Would Trade David Wright For

- Three 24 packs of Diet Coke

- A new jingle for his radio show

- Bronson Arroyo

- Soil from Saratoga Springs

- A new partner for his radio show

- 7 straight days of sunlight

- Southside Johnny

- Brandon Inge

- A 4th number one ranked show in New York

- Any books on JFK

- Bill Parcells

- Sarah Palin

- Nate McLouth

- PSL's

MIKE'S DAVID WRIGHT HATRED HITS THE WEB

Doing my regular jog around the world wide web and found that we are not the only folks finding Mike's "trade David Wright" a little crazy. Saw this article on The Big Lead. Check out the collection of words in the parenthetical at the end. Now we can add "laughable" to the list. Buster Olney earlier called anyone who suggested the Mets trade David Wright, "silly." We are waiting anxiously for "idiotic" or "dumb ass."

Stuck in a car today, we took in a lot of sports talk radio. A somewhat spirited regional debate took place: Do the Mets need to break up their core? Can’t deal Beltran or Reyes for position/production reasons, which leaves … the Prince-in-Waiting of NYC, David Wright. They say he’s not clutch (to be more precise, ‘they’ is radio guy Mike Francesa) and has never won anything (because Chase Utley’s 2-for-11 showing in the NLDS last year was something special!). As for the loosely-defined, hard-to-quantify ‘clutch’ label, there’s a massive story on baseball clutchness in USA Today.
If you want to kill yourself, you can swallow a bottle of just about anything; if you want to get dumber, just listen to (most) sports talk radio.
(The mere thought that anyone would consider dealing David Wright is laughable. Because gold glove 3B who are 25 years old, and in their first four seasons bat over .300, averages 29 homers and 114 RBI and are in the Top 10 in the NL in almost every statistical category grow on fucking trees.)

Here's Why Mike is a Moron

Yep. I have been pushed too far by listening to Mike these past few days. He started out right on target in his open yesterday, but quickly veered wayyy off course. He has essentially pinned the Mets collapse the past two years onto David Wright. Anyone who thinks otherwise just hasn't been listening close enough. He has pretty much called for Wright to be traded. But herein lies the issue at hand: Mike is a Moron. Since I have been unable to get thru to WFAN the past two days, I will outline my points below in the hopes that Mike checks out the blog:

- David Wright is a 25 year old All-Star third basemen whose average season in the majors is: .309BA, 31 HR, 113 RBI, 107 runs
- Mike has repeatedly said that Wright has NEVER hit in the clutch. Yet, upon further review, here are some instances that show otherwise:

Last September, while the entire Met team was collapsing and every game was bigger than the next, Wright hit .352 for the month with over 20 RBI.

Mike has asked caller after caller to name one clutch hit Wright has ever had. Without digging too far back, a commentor on this board pointed out 2 huge hits this year...one off KROD in a HUGE series for the Mets against Anaheim when they were trailing in the 9th inning...another go ahead homerun against Cincy in the 9th after the All-Star break when the Mets were trying to continue their 10 game winning streak.

Mike has painted Wright as a guy who never hits in pressure situations. While he was admittedly bad this season in the clutch, last year Wright hit .310 for the season with men in scoring position and he hit .346 in Close and Late situations last year. Okay you say, but that's just one year - what about 2006? So glad you asked. In 2006, Wright hit .365 with men in scoring position and .348 in Close and Late situations. Okay, well then he must have sucked in 2005, right? Not quite. He hit .298 with men in scoring position that season, although he did struggle Close and Late that year hitting just .239. Yeah, but he was terrible this September you say? Well he sure did bomb in a couple big spots BUT for the month, Wright hit .340 with 6 homers and 21 RBI and in this season when he could not buy a clutch hit, Wright did bat .286 in Close and Late situations.

Mike has gone on and on about how the Mets will never win anything with this core four. Yet Mike does forget that they did win a playoff series in 2006 against the Dodgers. And Mike forgets that this guy David Wright, who has done "nothing in a big spot" in his entire career, hit .333 in that postseason series.

Reason number 83 why Mike is a Moron. His suggestions for trades for Wright include Jimmy Rollins, Chase Utley and Ryan Howard. Yeah, Mike Philly and the Mets are going to trade superstars to each other. Why stop there, let's see if we can package Arod and Cano to Boston for Youkillis and Beckett?

So clearly Mike, clearly, the Mets must rid themselves of this unproven talent named David Wright. Obviously the Mets can't win with this guy on their team. They should ship him away for Matt Holliday as fast as possible...just make sure you DON'T look at Holliday's splits outside of Coors because those numbers drop faster than your ratings for your solo show. Mike, I am sorry, but sometimes you must be presented with the sad truth. And today that truth is simple: You are a Moron.

THE 4 CORE WILL NEVER WIN TOGETHER

We here at the blog like to take shots at Mike's frequent incorrect predictions. Well time to add another one to the watch list..Just moments ago, Mike talking about the core 4 of the Mets: Reyes, Delgado, Beltran and Wright - had this to say:

"Here's what I'll tell you right now. And just remember I said it to you. The 4 core will never win together. If they don't break them up, they will never win together. It's a bad core."

As if Francesa haters didn't need more ammo, it's time to root for the "the core 4" like never before...

MIKE HAS A NUMB LIP

Mike reported he was late to work today because of a case of a numb face. He thought he was perhaps having a serious medical ailment and went in for a battery of tests. All came back with good results. Mike is fine. Apparently, Mike's exposure to the sun may have been the culprit. So for any of you out there worried that something was seriously wrong, worry not. Mike just has a virus in lis lip. Now back to blaming the economic downfall of America, the situation in Iraq and homelessness on David Wright..

LAZY BASTARD

As we have all chronicled, Mike Francesa started his new era on thin ice. He promised changes, co-hosts, jingles, the whole bit. And he's delivered next to nothing. Even the name of his new show stinks - Mike'd Up Francesa on The Fan. Then yesterday, the Mets collapse basically gave Mike Meth Mouth. Out he come with vigor and passion and opinion. And how does he follow it up? By coming in late for today's show. Evan and Joe did a nice little song and dance show for his tardiness. Inexcusable. This guy doesn't get it. He just doesn't want to put in the effort to further his career.

Now, of course, he'll come in and say that he had some personal issues and I'll feel like Loki. But as of 1:12, this is atrocious.

BUSTER OLNEY CALLS MIKE SILLY

Well, that's not really true. But he did sort of call him silly by association. Read Buster Olney's take on the Mets situation and in particular all that's wrong with Mr Wright. (is a sentence like that simply awful writing or creative genius?).. Here's Buster

So there might be one tangible thing the Mets need to fix: They need to get David Wright … well, right. They need to help him work through his apparent anxiety in high-pressure situations. Big-picture: The Mets didn't make the playoffs because of their bullpen failures, as Jack Curry writes, but over the weekend, they mustered a total of five runs, and Wright had a whole lot to do with that. He cares so deeply that he puts enormous pressure on himself, and this trait seems to wreck him in big spots. He seems to leap at the ball when he's trying to hit with the game on the line. They need to address this.
I don't know how they do it. Maybe they get Wright to start talking to a sports psychologist, someone who might get the kind of help that has aided John Smoltz and Matt Garza and others. Wright is a cornerstone player who will be an MVP candidate in most years of his career, so the notion of trading him is silly. But they have to help him find a way to relax -- and if the team's best player relaxes, this will, in turn, take pressure off the rest of the team.

YOU SEE.. Buster said that the notion of trading Wright is silly. Mike thinks the Mets should trade Wright. So essentially Buster called Mike silly.

DIFFERENT, YET THE SAME

Any Met fan should really be hanging their heads. Not only did their team blow it,
but they have to sit and listen to the gleeful Mike Francesa piss all over their team. Hey Mike, we didn't get our pound of flesh when the Yankees were eliminated. They didn't collapse. They just stunk.

Anyway, here is a compare/contrast on today's show with both takes from Abbott and Costello:

ON THE METS DOWN THE STRETCH
Francesa - "Those guys gagged again. They don't know how to win!"
Russo - "The Mets lack a quotient of courage."

ON JERRY MANUEL
Francesa - He likes Jerry and thinks he should come back. "I will smile at him if he comes back."
Russo - He likes Jerry and thinks he should come back.

ON THE SHEA POST-GAME CEREMONY:
Francesa - "Part of the Mets' charm is that they could screw up a one-car funeral.
The post-game Shea ceremony was one of the most surrealistic celebrations of mankind."
Russo - They did a better job than the Yankees. It wasn't pretentious. He was glad that Mr. Met was involved.

ON THE CORE
Francesa - There are 3 untouchables(Pelfrey, Santana and Beltran). The rest of the team can go.
Russo - Mets in a tricky spot. How can you break up the core? "They have to keep Delgado. Wright's too good. Reyes is too good. You have to bring back Beltran."

ON JOHAN SANTANA
Francesa - Santana did his job. The rest of the team? Not so much.
Russo - Santana pitched wonderfully. But this isn't about him.

THE MIKE AND EVAN SHOW

This is a special special special day. Mike opened the show with energy that we have not seen before, but then right before our eyes we got to see a new show develop. The Mike and Evan show. A show where Mike is not the only man in the booth. Where it is not Mike's voice and no dissenting opinion. Enter Evan. Yes, he is 8 years old but he is talking back at Mike. He is saying Mike is wrong. He is making Mike back up his point. They are having a discussion. A debate. Maybe even an arguement.

For the first time in weeks, months, I am watching a radio show that I am enjoying. Whether you like Evan or not what this shows is that we need the "Mike AND ?" show. Whoever that ? is, we need him in there. We need him in there now.

The Day that Mike Francesa was Reborn

Today's open has featured Francesa going ballistic on the Mets. Going off on the Wilpons. Going off on the Met offense. Going off on everything and anything Met related (except for Johan and Beltran). Taking a shot at Omar. And for those that don't know, I, First Time, Long Time, happen to be a diehard Met fan. And I was cringing having to listen to Francesa today. I even thought I would be motivated to call in to the show to debunk Mike's ranting and raving. But I have to tell you something. Mike has been dead on correct in his assessment of the Mets and Jerry Manuel. There is nothing that I can argue with. This is the Mike Francesa that I want to listen to everyday. This is the Mike Francesa that can easily make Christopher Russo fade away into oblivion rather quickly. This is the Mike Francesa that WFAN needs on a daily basis. All it took was another Mets collapse.

MIKE AND MINAYA SCENARIO

If you watched Mike'd Up last night (and if you choose sleep instead, you were smart. It is essentially the radio show with craft services) you got a chance to hear a preview of what you will hear from Mike today. The big news is that he completely backed off what he was saying all week and weeks before that, which was that the Mets could not bring Manuel, without making it to the playoffs, into the new building.

Last night, Mike changed his tune. He seemed ok that Omar had decided to bring Jerry back. He said that "you could argue that he shouldn't come back" but that it was ok. This is where my issue begins.

We all that Mike and Omar are friends. Could Omar have called up Mike and told him to not go crazy about the Jerry hiring? Could Omar, in return, promise to continue to give Mike some insider info on the Mets and perhaps even refuse to go on Russo's show? Who knows. But what is a little tricky to me is the fact that Omar Minaya has been the general manager of a team that has had not one but two awful September collapses. He has been the general manager that fired Willie Randolph in the middle of the night which everyone criticized. He is the general manager that put together this team, including the bullpen. And he is the general manager that is now getting a four year deal? And our pal Mike has nothing to say about that? These are the things that he yells and screams about. Too many callers spend time kissing Mike's ass and too few call him out on these issues. He needs to be taken to task. He needs to know that we are aware of the huge contradictions and the conflicts of interest that these relationships cause. Omar's ok. Jerry's ok. Reyes and Wright, not so much.

Something is rotten in the state of Francesa.

MANUEL WILL RETURN TO METS. FRANCESA FURIOUS.

The first part is true according to Jon Heyman and other websites who are all reporting that Jerry Manuel is returning as Mets manager. The second part can only be assumed. First the Yankees don't listen to Mike about Joba, now the Mets are refusing to listen. Hell hath no fury like Francesa scorned.

 Mike believes that the Mets need to head into the new ballpark without connections to the failures of the past, the Mets obviously believe the opposite since they will be bringing to Citi Field not only the GM, manager (and 2007 coach), along with shortstop, third and first baseman, centerfielder and several other players who were a part of both the 2007 and 2008 Mets meltdowns.

 First Time Long Time and I have been talking and here are the points Mike is likely to repeat many times tomorrow. Here are the OVER/UNDERS

1. Jerry Manuel shouldn't be the manager: Over/Under 46. We will hit the thousands by Friday. The Mets have disobeyed an order. This is unacceptable.

2. Breaking up the core: Over/Under 55: This could be the most repeated one of the day. The Mets needing to get new energy, new winning players, players who are not a part of this history.

3. Trading the shortstop: Over/Under 30: When Mike says breakup or moving players out, or breaking up the core, it's really code for trading the shortstop who is also named Jose Reyes. Mike doesn't like Reyes, he has been wanting to trade him since before Willie was fired. He will certainly be banging the drum for this one.

 What points are we missing? 

FUTURE OF MIKE'D UP ON THE LINE SUNDAY

Yes, the playoff future of the Mets, along with an extended farewell for Shea Stadium, but that is not the only future that hangs in the balance on Sunday. The future of Mike'd Up Francesa on the Fan, the Diet Coke Diva, The Ego and two guys positioning for the 2 AM - 4 AM shift, and any other name of our favorite sports radio show to hate is on the line on this day of rest.

Think about it. The Mets win and Mike actually has some content for the show, moments to analyze, things to fill time that will be of interest, (or at least fodder for ridicule), guests to book (we have EDDIE C for the full FIVE HOURS), and tons of moments to guarantee things to happen that don't happen and never having to say i was wrong.

The Mets and I am not even prepared to envision what follows. How will Mike BY HIMSELF as he is still without not only a jingle (please someone tell me, how hard could it be to come up with a :30 song by now? How could it be taking this long? Please someone explain it to me. Is it the two names? Is it that very little rhymes with Francesa? Does the jingle have to have Diet Coke mentions? Is Mike insisting on the jingle includes horse racing or perhaps the titles of all of his number 1 shows? Is there some secret deal being made and they are creating a super group out of Poison, Color Me Badd and Billy Ray Cyrus but they are still trying to locate all the members of CMB? I get it. The jingle companies don't work in August, but we are almost in October. WRITE AN F***ING SONG ALREADY. Don't even use lyrics. Just go with some Beverly Hills Cop Axel F or that track they used throughout Ferris Bueller. JUST GET US A SONG ALREADY. I REALLY NEED TO WRITE ABOUT HOW BAD IT IS)

I digress. Sorry, the jingle thing gets me crazy. But once again, Mike solo, without a jingle, a partner, and most importantly without anything to talk about except football and awful trade proposals is going to be brutal. He is then going to be forced to fill time talking about non sports stuff like politics, some JFK book, movies (Jeffrey Lyons, please pick up the red courtesy phone), and other things he knows nothing about.

This game tomorrow is serious. For the Mets. For Mike, but more importantly for us. We need a win because we need the Mets, because without them, all we got is a large man in a studio in Astoria with five hours of radio and nothing at all to talk about.

So, whether you are a Mets fan, a Yankees fan, a non New York fan, or simply a fan of people, or life, or the ear, or the afternoon hours of 1pm and 630pm, please root for the orange and blue tomorrow. Our futures depend on it.

YOU ASK.. WE PROVIDE

Before I begin, a quick moment for Paul Newman who died this morning. We reference movies a bunch on this blog, so figured it was ok to mention. Not only was he a damn good actor but donated tons of money to charity. Feel free to weigh in with favorite Paul Newman movies. GMAN, what ya got for us?

Moving on, you have written and we have read and now we are blogging. You want a place to talk Mets today, well, here ya go. Turn on the game, type in Mike and the Mad Blog, get some sort of nourishment, tacos, sausage, tacos and sausage, whatever works, and comment away.

As I have mentioned, I now root with Mike in my head, with his phrases swirling around my mind. It's very unfortunate. As we head into the pre-game period, here are the Mike phrases that are running in my head. Which Mike phrases are you hearing? What do you think he would say about the Santana on short rest? What about Russo?

Mets fan, Yankees fan, Phillies fan, Albert Pujols fan, taco fan, you are all welcome. Bring the wit, the snark, the opinion, the creativity (feel free to write a jingle for this blog), and away we go...

THE MIKE'D UP MANUAL ON MANUEL

Yes, the loss tonight by the Mets was bad and if things continue to move this way the Mets are going to have several decisions to make and one of the big ones will be about Jerry Manuel. Do the Mets bring him back or bring in someone else.

By this point we all know the Mike'd Up Manual on Manuel (yes, i do feel extraordinarily clever with that one). If the Mets make the playoffs, Mike would bring Jerry back, who by the way he is rooting for as he has told us over and over. No playoffs, no Jerry Fun Times.

On page one of the Mike'd Up Manual on Manuel is that if Willie got fired, then Jerry can't stay. This theory goes like this, Willie didn't have the luxury of a motivated Carlos Delgado or Jose Reyes, which Jerry got. Jerry though has spent a lot of his time without a closer and still found a way to win.
The other big theory from Professor Francesa is that the Mets need a fresh start for the new stadium and cannot bring in someone connected to the collapse. But if you go with that then half the team wouldn't be able to step onto Citi Field.

I think Manuel doesn't make the best decisions sometimes, but it seems like he has the right personality for New York and that the issue here after two managers and two seasons of failure and collapse fall more on the core players who make up this team. I think that the Mets may have found their manager but might need to alter the players. Or adjust the man who put the players together...

Oh, wait they can't do that, they just gave him a four year extension. Let me check the manual to see the reasons behind that.

What do you think? You go along with the Manual on Manuel theories or you have a different point of view?

DIFFERENT, YET THE SAME

So after listening to the first 30 minutes of both shows, here is how Mike and Chris saw things last night:

Mike - Would have walked both Delgado and Beltran.
Chris - Would have pitched to Delgado.

If the Mets get rained out tonight...

Mike - They'll play a double header on Sunday.
Chris - They'll play a double header on Saturday.

Mike - Brewers should sweep. Mets will have to sweep.
Chris - Better chance of Mets sweeping than Brewers.

Now this isn't news breaking stuff, but you see the discrepancy. Wouldn't it have been great to hear them on the same show, going at it? Instead, we get them in the same city, yet worlds apart.

THE METS WIN, NO ONE TOLD MIKE AND OTHER THINGS THAT ARE MAKING ME INSANE

Ok, i just listened to the open to Mike'd Up, Francesa on the Fan. Wait.. MIKE, pick a name, which is it. Are you Mike'd Up or are you Francesa on the Fan? Is it because you have all those number 1 shows that this show needs two names? PICK A NAME, PLEASE. Maybe the jingle company is having trouble because it's hard to do a jingle for a show that has two f**ing names!!!

Back to the open, did you know that the Mets lost last night? WHAT, you say, the Mets didn't lose, they hung in there and once again after a devastating loss someone won a game that you thought they were certain to lose. Mike decided to not feature any of the positive parts of the Mets win and instead focused on bad baserunning and a failed bunt. Were these storylines? Of course. Are they the only thing worth talking about? Absolutely not. If the pinstripe team from the Bronx went through this we would hear about karma and mystique, but it's the Mets so we hear only about mistakes. THEY WON THE GAME. THEY WON THE GAME. They are tied for the wild card and one game out. That's pretty good considering this is a team that fired their manager mid season, lost their closer, has blown 1700 saves. Usually a team like that is packing their bags for the winter, but the METS ARE STILL IN IT. Give it a rest Mike

Next, WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH MIKE AND THE PHILLIES? Did I miss something? Let me know, it may have been when i was viewing the Real World Road Rules Challenge, but are the Phillies some combination of the 27 Yankees, the 1998 Yankees, Bill Russell Celtics, John Wooden's Bruins? Just tell me, I could have missed it. If not, why the hell does Mike seem to believe that this team will never lose? He has yet to own up to the fact that the Phillies lost two of three to the Braves who he said Philly would kill. He now guarantees that Philly will take care of business against the Nationals. YES, the Nationals are bad. But they still play the games, Mike. They actually play them. On a field. With people. With bats and balls and gloves. It's really fun. They've made some cool movies that show it happening. MIKE, YOU ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY. THE PHILLIES MIGHT LOSE SOME GAMES HERE. THEY ARE ACTUALLY PLAYING NOT GREAT BASEBALL. GIVE IT A REST.

Finally.. 10 FT, 15FT, 30FT.. What are these? According to Mike, Ryan Church was out by all of these lengths for the play at the plate in last nights game. First it was 30ft, then it was 15ft, then it was 10. WHICH IS IT? You might be saying, LT WEINBERG, why does that bother you so much? IT JUST DOES. THE DUDE JUST ISN'T CLOSE SOMETIMES. And if any of you fans described things the way he does you would get hand waved into the abyss.

WE ARE BACK AND ON IT TODAY. THANKS FOR HOLDING DOWN THE FORT.

Mike and Chris' Open

I'm getting a bit nostalgic here for the days of Mike and Chris together again. So I have decided to write today's open as if nothing ever happened between the two. I am going to pretend that the words Yunel Escobar, Don Nelson, Yankee Stadium bathroom, Manny, Ortiz mean nothing. I am going to ignore the significance of those names and locations. I am going to pretend a break-up never happened:

Chris: And gooood Afternooooon Everybodddyyyyyyy! On this rainy Friday, September the 26th on WFAN..YES is here and ROW in Albany is piggybacking. How are you today Mike?

Mike: Fine.

Chris: Well Mike, ahh where do you wanna go today? Where do you want to start?

Mike: Got to start with the baseball Dog.

Chris: Well Mike listen..big win for the Mets last night. But I just can't get too wrapped up in it.

Mike: That was a must win Dog. A must win.

Chris: Good point Mike, good point.

Mike: I mean this team has showed the ability to rebound from some unthinkable losses..

Chris: Ohh brutal ones Mike. Brutal losses.

Mike: But Dog, they pick themselves up off the canvas every time. I mean it really is amazing. Now listen, that Cubs team was a joke last night.

Chris: I mean CMON Pinella. Can you put a couple of players on the field! Just one! PLEASE! I mean Timmy's Little League team could have beaten those Cubs last night!!

Mike: What's Louie suppose to do...you got puddles all over the field.

Chris; BUT CMON MIKE! Can I get Derrek Lee for two at bats? Ramirez for one? Soriano? Soriano's not getting tired. CMON! That lineup was ATROCIOUS.

Mike: Dog, they almost beat the Mets.

Chris: EXCELLENT POINT MIKE! EXCELLENT POINT.

Mike: The Mets never have any rocking chair games. Close your eyes, pick a reliever.

Chris: I just can't go too crazy about that Met win. The team that they played stinks. Pedro has been TERRIBLE. Now I don't want to hear Met fans tell me that Pedro was a good contract.

Mike: Dog, he gave them credibility.

Chris; Mike, he's pitched ONE YEAR FOR THE METS! ONE YEAR. He's Done. Toast. Finito. Finished. That was NOT a good contract Mike.

Mike: I completely disagree. He made that team matter again. He made guys wanna come play for the Mets.

Chris. OH CMON Mike. Could ya Please! Ya think Beltran wasn't going to the highest bidder? Johan was about to pack up his bags and go back to Minnesota if the Mets didn't give him that extra $5 million. No one came here for Pedro.

Mike: Dog, he turned that franchise around.

Chris: He stinks Mike. Pedro stinks. And another thing, these Met fans that have booed Delgado all year long, that booed Schoenweis on Opening Day, that boo Heilman when he gets in his car in the morning, these same Met fans now give Pedro a standing ovation when he leaves last night? I mean PIPE DOWN mets fans. You're a bunch of phonies. Pedro hasn't thrown a good inning for you in 4 years and you treat him like he's the second coming of Cy Young. And then you'll boo Delgado when he hits into a double play...

Mike: They love Pedro.

Chris: And Mike, what is the kid Murphy doing trying to bunt there?

Mike: This is what happens when you put young kids in big spots. Murphy almost cost them the season last night.

Chris: I'm down on the Mets right now.

DOGGIN IT

We are Mike and the Mad Blog and we have lately, due to the fact that we are too cheap to purchase XM radio and none of you have donated a subscription which still has First Time Long Time very upset, we have been lacking in the Mad Dog part of our content.

Our pal GMAN posted some today but starting tomorrow we will have a page dedicated to those listening to the Mad Dog. Please if you are listening to Chris, let us know what is happening as he attempts to do the national scenario.

STRUGGLING SCENARIO

My work travels took me to San Francisco this week. On my Airtran flight and in my rental car, I had XM radio. So I got a good earful of Russo this week. Despite all the Dog love on this blog, I think it's time for a little reality check. He has been spotty this week.

His big problem is that he hasn't figured out how to do a national show yet. He's still leaning on New York stuff. And granted, a lot of that stems from the callers. My rough estimate puts 80% of the callers either from the NY metro area or used to be from there. And of course, they want to talk New York stuff.

Chris makes a big effort to talk about national topics, but this is a struggle. Basically because that ain't in his wheelhouse. One of the worst segments was with Marty Schottenheimer on Monday. We all know he overuses the word 'scenario', but this was too much. He would just throw out a team, stumble for a question and then end with 'scenario'. It went like this, "Marty, the Bills blah blah blah blah, what do you think about that scenario." He literally did this 5 times in a row. Marty is not good radio, but this made him worse. He wasn't given a specific question, so he just spat out generic comments like, 'Any week any team can win' or 'They need to play better defense.' It was a brutally painful segment. It just highlighted the fact that in an attempt to cover NFL teams across the country, he spread himself thin on the knowledge front.

Just like Francesa, Russo really needs a producer to help structure his show. His show jumps all over the place like some meth head. And whenever he talks about New York, he makes these qualifying statements like, "For those of you in Nebraska that want to talk about the Missouri game, we'll get to it. Right now, we have to talk about Yankee Stadium."

I think I need to call into him today to take him to task for this bullshit criticism of Johan Santana from yesterday. I will alert you when I call in. Is anyone beside KBill listening to the angry puppy?

20/20 Update

We turn to you the Fan, for a John Minko inspired 20/20 update. How ballistic did Mike go today in his open? How much did tee off on David Wright? Keep us afloat again today while we are unable to blog. No need for concern, we will be back in full force tomorrow.

TIME TO PLAY... PREDICT THE OPEN

What's it going to be today. Mike going to rant and rave saying the METS HAD TO WIN THAT GAME. Go crazy about anyone saying that they should bring Jerry back next year.. YOU CANNOT BRING HIM BACK AFTER LOSING GAMES THIS WAY. Or is he going to say, you just can't make this stuff up.

How about this, maybe he will say... "Fans, terrible loss for the Mets, i am really amazed at this BUT i have to own up something. I made a really bad statement and I was wrong. I said that there was no way that the Phillies were going to lose to the Braves that it would never ever be possible, and then the Phillies lost to the Braves twice. Boy, I was so wrong. I have been wrong so much lately. Wrong about the Rays, wrong about the Phillies, wrong when I said I would have a co-host or a jingle or a compelling 5 hour radio show. Wrong especially when i said i would drink green tea."

What do you think will happen? Take a shot, write up your Francesa open.

THE PHILLIES REFUSE TO DO WHAT MIKE TELLS THEM TO

I AM VERY HAPPY. The Phillies refuse to listen to Mike and drive away from the Mets and they are definitely going to get sent to their room like Joba was for disobeying Mike and not beating the Braves like they have done all season.

OH, MIKE.. when will you learn? Just because the Phillies beat the Braves during the season all along, doesn't mean they automatically beat them now. Watch these games Mike. You will see how things change. Remember 1988, the Mets beat the crap out of the Dodgers all season and so I would bet you predicted a Mets sweep, but whatya think happened? The Dodgers beat the Mets.

I would love someone to call Mike and say, "Hey Mike, love the show... when Chris was on it." and then say "Mike, I read the Phillies license plate, it says Braves Win."

YUP, another night of rooting against Mike.

Terrible Job

Commenters of the Mike and the Mad Blog. You guys are really dropping the ball today. 3 comments on today's show? C'mon. We expect more. That is an atrocious job out of you. Not sure if we can trust you in a big spot. This idea that we handed the keys to the blog over to you and all we've got today are 3 comments is just a bad job. We expected your "A" Game today. Think of this as your pennant race. We need you guys to perform. We're unable to listen today. Step it up. What is happening today on Mike'd Up/Francesa on the Fan/The show formerly known as Mike and the Mad Dog?

DAYTIME BLOGGING

Here's the deal loyal readers.. we here at the Mike and the Mad Blog have moments when we actually work. We try to keep it to a minimum due to our dedication to each and every one of you, but this week has been a busy one and that continues for the next day or so.. With that said, we are asking for your help since we will be unable to listen. This will be the case tomorrow as well but after that, we are back on our game.

We will also be blogging tonight for the Mets playoff race, so check in later on. Thanks for the work and take it easy on young Loki.

MIKE OPEN: NO LICENSE PLATE COMMENTS

Funny thing happened during the 1pm open. Mike made a mention of the Mets closing the gap on the Phils, yet no mention of how first place is unreachable for the Mets. Mike fully expects the Phillies to win tonight. Isn't there a chance that they could lose, Mike? Teams lose in sports. It does happen. The Phillies are not the 27 Yankees. They don't exactly have great pitching.

Mike cut me a break, just once, just one day, please, please, just pretend, for me, that you have no idea what is going to happen in the future. Please, please, take a chance and say, "hey, the Mets are a bit closer with the Phils and they could catch them. The Phillies have had their down times this season. It could happen."

Just try it. See how it feels. You tried green tea for a bit, I think that bit was about 8 seconds, but you tried it. Give this a shot. For me, please.

THEY ACTUALLY BOOKED GUESTS

Looks like Eddie Erickson has decided to work this week and they are booking guests for the show. We got Rick Peterson (not sure why), Omar, Frank Gifford, Jerry Manuel. This is the key for this solo show until the planets align and Mike gets a co host. They need guests all the time. Limit the Mike solo time. That is the key.

By the way, can someone tell me when Sid Rosenberg became the greatest radio host of all time? I never paid attention to the dude when he is here and i won't be devastated if he doesn't return, yet, the folks at MF.com seem all weepy about this. Please someone tell me why i should care about Sid Rosenberg and then maybe i can make some room in my heart for him. Otherwise, let's move on and get this guy a co-host.

PREDICT THE OPEN:

20 minutes away from 1pm. Here's your chance to play another fabulous game associated with Mike'd Up/Francesa on the Fan (which is it by the way?)

PREDICT THE OPEN: Guess what Mike will say at 1pm

A: Starts with the Mets, they won, this is why you got Santana, the whole bit. He ignores everything he said about the Phillies not being catchable and doesn't remember anything about how the Braves can't beat Philly.

B: Starts with the Yankees because this is historic, first time in 13 years, blah blah blah...

C: Mets, then Yankees, talks about his new bromance with Nate McClouth, repeats himself on Jerry Manuel not being the manager if they don't make the post season, Hank Steinbrenner being a moron, etc

D: Leads with Dancing with the Stars and raves about Brooke Burkes performance.

THE TALK TO ME IN AUGUST SYNDROME

Now that the Yankees are officially out the playoffs, it's time for me to present my theory on why the Yankees failed this year. It's called the TALK TO ME IN AUGUST SYNDROME.

Throughout the year, all of us who listen to the show formerly known as Mike and the Mad Dog had to hear Mike brush away any Yankees issue with those five words, "talk to me in August." It was arrogance, yes, but what it also exhibited was the mindset that I believe not only existed in Yankees fans but Yankee players. Everyone, fans, players, believed that the Yankees had a switch that they could turn on in August. A switch that has energized them during the past several seasons and made any earlier failures insignificant. I have to believe that the way that Mike looked at the Rays and Yankees was no different than how the Yankees viewed themselves.

Starting pitching is bad... TALK TO ME IN AUGUST
No clutch hitting: TALK TO ME IN AUGUST
Joe Girardi is wound too tight: TALK TO ME IN AUGUST
Jeter's hitting into too many double plays: TALK TO ME IN AUGUST
Rivera keeps blowing tie games: TALK TO ME IN AUGUST
Every other Yankee issue: TALK TO ME IN AUGUST

And then August arrived and then August left. It actually left so quickly that the Yankees were unable to make out it's license plate. August turned to September and we looked back at the month and there was nothing to talk about in the 8th month of the year. The conversation had not changed, the Yankees never made a move, the past ills were never resolved or addressed. The switch never was turned on.

The Torre v Girardi issue definitely needs to be part of the discussion. Same team, same season, same injuries, is there a different result with the same old Joe instead the new one? I will admit I am not a fan of Girardi, i think he is wound tighter than Ferris Bueller's pal Cameron Frye. I think the way he refuses to talk about injuries is ridiculous and I simply find him less than genuine. I am not here to praise Torre either, he may have run his course. It's just a question, does the August switch go on with him wearing pinstripes?

That's my theory. The Yankees players were no different than Mike. They were arrogant and simply believed as Mike always does, that the past exists on repeat. Simply because something happened before it would happen again.

The visionaries see change. Those left behind sit snug in the past, waiting for the same and making arrogant proclamations with those same five words...

TALK TO ME IN AUGUST

MY LEAST FAVORITE SPORTS TEAM

It has only one member. The name of this team is Mike Francesa. Take a night like tonight. I find myself not rooting for a particular team, I find myself rooting against the things that Mike Francesa says. On the show today he stated how the Phillies are gone, that the Mets couldn't even see their license plate, they passed them by so fast. He also stated that the Phils never lose to the Braves and will not do so. So tonight I find myself rooting against Francesa or against the words of Francesa or better yet for his declarations to be proven false and tonight, that's just what happened.

The Phils lost to the Braves and the Mets won and the two teams are just a little bit closer and perhaps the Mets can actually read that license plate.

The thing that continues to kill me about Mike is that he is a man who has worked in sports his entire career, has been a fan for his whole life, he has seen 'Nova beat Georgetown, the Red Sox come back from down 3-0, Team USA beat the Russians. He has witnessed all of this, yet he still speaks about sporting events as if their endings are predetermined. Sports doesn't work that way. He should know that. Yet he would rather declare things as fact, as if he knows something we don't and then he rarely, if ever admits he's wrong.

Tonight, was a good night. The declaration didn't come true. Another loss for my least favorite team.

ELIMINATION DAY

'Tis a sad day for Yankee fans. The Bombers have officially been eliminated from the playoffs tonight with the Red Sox winning. So while we await 2-3 words on the topic tomorrow from Mike Francesa, perhaps Dog summed it up best back in early August when he eliminated the Yankees from the playoffs. Enjoy a little vintage Dog on a night when he no doubt has a huge smile across his face:

THE PANIC OF 2008

Nope not the fact that financial instutions are going under, but the Mets, the New York Mets are the cause of the Panic of 2008. This is the follow up to the horror film, the Panic of 2007. A few returning stars, some new ones, Jerry Manuel in for Willie Randolph brings a little bit more humor to the part as opposed to Willie's method approach...

The score as i type this is 1-0 Cubs and according to Mike Francesa, if the Mets lose tonight, PANIC will set in on the Mets, on their fans, on the city, maybe even in the bunker in Astoria from where he broadcasts.

And do not bother to scoreboard watch by the way because the Phils, according to Mike will not lose again. Of this he is certain.

We do have a fair share of Mets fans tonight, so if ya wanna panic, you might as well do it with strangers with fake names. So sit down at the couch, ignore your wife, your girlfriend, your dog, your cat, your Nintendo Wii, the upcoming election, the state of the nation, the state of yourself, ignore it all and simply watch the game and share with your friends here at Mike and the Mad Blog as the Mets 2008 season hangs on the cliff.

LAUREN FROM ISLIP GETS SOME LOVE

Lauren from Islip called up and boy did Mike enjoy her call. She is a first time caller, enjoys Mets games and was concerned about John Maine. She wanted to know about how the Mets are going to use him and when he should warm up either on Saturday or save him for the Pedro outing. Mike was charmed. I am not sure if it was just that this was a female voice, an island of estrogen in a testosterone infested ocean, but whatever it was, Mike was loving Lauren and uttered a phrase i don't believe i have ever heard leave his vocal chords.

"You asked excellent questions.."

That was followed by "you made a good point about the Pedro game."

Maybe, all we have to do is call in and say that we are Lauren from Islip and Mikey will give us some respect and say that we have asked excellent questions

GUESS THE SALARIES

We wanted to bring you in on a little game we play here at Mike and the Mad Blog. It's fun, so here we go. It's time to play

GUESS THE SALARIES:
All you need to do is guess the salaries of these select WFAN employees. We know, after his rant that Francesa makes somewhere between $1 and Bill Gates money. But what about these folks?

John Minko: guessing his salary has always been tricky. He does very little but they have to pay him, unless this has been the longest internship in the history of the intern program. But how much? 60,000? 100,000? Free hair club consultations?

Eddie Erickson: We know he gets a tip from Mike when they finish first which happens all the time because Mike is the only person with 3 number 1 shows on the air, but before the tip, how much does E2 make?

Sal Lacatta: This guy answers the phone. I'm not certain what else he does. From what i'm told telemarketers don't make a ton of cash and they actually dial numbers. How much does someone who just answers calls make? It's a pretty specialized skill, so maybe he's like a lefty reliever and makes good dollars.

Ok, get in the game. It's fun. It's like Deal or No Deal without the hot models.

ROGERS CLEMENS GETS A BOOSTER SHOT FROM MIKE AND JON HEYMAN

I believe it was a shot of B 12 or it was a shot full of HGH, but only for his wife prior to a Sports Illustrated shoot, but whatever was in the syringe, Mike and the INSIDER Jon Heyman gave a shot of approval for Roger Clemens attending the Yankees farewell ceremony.

Yes, i know that the Yankees have a little bit of a steroid issue given the presence of Giambi, Pettite, IRod, etc on their roster and so maybe they look like hypocrites, but does anyone honestly feel that Clemens could have attended this ceremony and it would not have turned into a circus? The guy is radioactive at the moment.

One option, maybe they could have had one of those pretend players like they had for Babe Ruth and Joe D, come out as Clemens, then they could have honored him as if he was dead to them, which he essentially is.

Puppets, fake players, I'm all for make believe to solve the problems. A little creativity goes a long way

IT'S TIME FOR MIKE TO TALK NFL TALK

I love it when regular Joe sports people start talking in coach terms. And if love means that i despise it to no end, then i mean love. Like someone like the Sports Guy when he writes about "bigs" to describe NBA forwards. Our pal, Mike Francesa really enjoys doing this. I have definitely heard him on occassion use the term "bigs," but when it gets to NFL time, boy does he love doing this. I guess it's his way of showing us how much he knows because not only does he have sleepovers with Bill Parcells but he can talk like him as well.

Today in discussing the Jets, we learned a new term. What would be great is if the FAN could handle these moments like Seasame Street and have puppets of Sal and Eddie and Minko and they could pop up where Chris used to sit and say:

Today's NFL term is "late middle." And then the Sal puppet and the Eddie puppet would be dressed in puppet football clothing and they would act out what "late middle" is and you would see the Eddie puppet as the quarterback throwing the ball "late middle" to the Sal puppet and the Sal puppet getting crushed by a Minko linebacker puppet because the ball was thrown "late middle."
If they did that and only if they did that, i could deal with this kind of talk. Honestly do we need a shortcut to saying "late over the middle?" Are those extra words so difficult to say?

Either use the puppets or talk like a normal human being.

TUESDAY'S SHOW

Tuesday we are going to be unable to blog for the day...So, we turn things over to you. That means you Kbilly. You Loki. You JD. You Nextbesthing. You wtsherman. And all the rest of the Anonymous souls out there. Use this post as a means to discuss anything that goes down on Tuesday's show. I have a feeling it might start with talk of a certain New York baseball team playing "tightly." You might hear Mike hint that he thinks the Mets need to unload Jose Reyes if they don't make the playoffs. You will hear talk of a collapse. You'll hear about the Phillies and all the gamers they have. You probably won't hear much about how Mike predicted a very close game between the Jets and Chargers. No. You won't hear much of that at all. But whatever you do hear, blog about it. Think of yourselves as a band of John Minko's, keeping all the loyal fans out there updated all afternoon.

What Did We Miss?

We here at the blog have missed the first hour of the show today. Fill us in. Did Mike call for MAJUR changes to the core of the Mets yet? Did he blame everything on Reyes? What has gone down?

MIKE FRANCESA = SARAH PALIN

Anyone else notice the similarities between these two? Both support John McCain. Both have suddenly found themselves the subject of intense scrutiny. Both complain that the media have treated them unfairly. Both are having their every word dissected by journalists (Okay, maybe for Mike, those journalists are just Phil Mushnick and Bob Raismann). Both think they are smarter than you and I. Both wear very charming glasses. Both have extremely irritating accents. Both are dismissive of their naysayers. Both find themselves in a tricky spot with pressurized new jobs. Both had careers in sports broadcasting. Both speak without relying on facts. Both are sometimes labeled bullies. Both have huge followings of supporters. Both like the outdoors: Mike enjoys the ponies, Sarah - killing moose. Both find the eyes of the world upon them. Both are being questioned if they can carry the load. Both will have their fates ultimately decided by the masses.

BREAKING NEWS

Wow. I just took a glance at the new poll I posted this morning about which show you prefer - Mike'd Up or Mad Dog Unleashed and Mike'd Up is holding a commanding lead at this point. What gives? What happened to the anti-Francesa faction? Is everyone really just closet Francesa lovers? Are you all feeling a bit sympathetic because Mike has been portrayed unfairly in the media? I am all for voting for the show you like, but I am just a bit taken aback at all the support Mike has gotten so far. Too early to predict a winner just yet...

THE JAMAICAN DUDE

A Jamaican national was just on the phone with Mike. I listen to a lot of Reggae and he was definitely hard to understand. So that means Mike couldn't understand a word. He nicely hung up on him with a 'So we know who Ken(the Jamaican dude) is rooting for now the Yankees aren't in the playoffs'.

A long time ago, we're talking 16 years go, I wanted to call in with a French accent and ask Mike and Chris about Steve 'bye bye' Balboni. Act is if I was a passionate French baseball fan. But alas I was wondering how I would get past the screener. Would they buy it? Could I pull it off? I think the better angle is to actually be a foreign national and call in. Like our friend, the Jamaican dude.

NICKNAME NOMINATIONS

Dear our loyal, dedicated readers...

Oh how i enjoy your comments on our blog, your wit, your passion, but the one thing that I want to comment on is the often used nickname for Mike Francesa.. "Fatcesa."

Simply, i think that we can do better. We got some clever folks on this site, got some ones that use words i don't even know, but right now we got no one that has come up with a better nickname for Mike than Fatcesa. Let's put an end to that.

We are now taking nominations for nicknames for Mike Francesa. This will be our version of Bar A just without the priest, Mike, Sal, or the rest of the bad parts. So bring the funny.

RUSSO AND KARMAZIN

Russo has been conspicuously quiet after Mike threw his hissy fit the other day and threw Doggie under the bus with his 'My cock is bigger than his cock' proclamations. So I was wondering if Russo got some sage advice to take the high road. Apparently, when Mel Karmazin first recruited Russo, he saw how things would play out and how Chris should handle it. This is what he must have said:

MEL
I think you're gonna find -- when
all this shit is over and done -- I
think you're gonna find yourself
one smilin' motherfucker. Thing is
Chris, right now you got ability.
But painful as it may be, ability
don't last. Now that's a hard
motherfuckin' fact of life, but
it's a fact of life your ass is
gonna hafta git realistic about.
This business is filled to the brim
with unrealistic motherfuckers who
thought their ass aged like wine.
Besides, even if you went all the
way, what would you be? King of the afternoon?
Who gives a shit? I doubt you can even
get a credit card based on that.

Mel lays an envelope full of money on the table in front of
Chris. Chris picks it up.

MEL
Now when Mike rips you for the first
time, you may feel a slight sting, that's pride
fuckin' wit ya. Fuck pride! Pride
only hurts, it never helps. Fight
through that shit. 'Cause a year
from now, when you're kickin' it
on satellite radio you're gonna say,
"Mel Karamazin was right."

CHRIS
I got no problem with that.

MUSHNICK CHIMES IN

I've been waiting for someone in the press to write about Mike Francesa's grumblings on Tuesday and Phil Mushnick finally chimed in.

Tuesday on WFAN, Francesa, now truly the One and Only, calmly snapped. He spent 40 minutes complaining that while Russo and his new gig were getting all the media attention, he'd received only unfair treatment by those who reported on their split. He claimed that no one had asked for his side of the story.
Does that mean that the story he repeatedly told on the air - the one about how they were often at war but genuinely liked each other, prospered together, and now, after 19 years, Russo had a nice opportunity, thus it was time for buddies to split - wasn't true? Would Francesa have provided a different tale, on the record, had he been asked off the air?
Francesa added that everything he has touched, with or without Russo, turns to ratings gold. Even his Sunday morning NFL radio show, he said, is No. 1 - with the exception of, he conceded, broadcasts of Spanish-language church services.
And Francesa said that bad reporting had badly underestimated the money he makes. But Tuesday, having given himself the opportunity to provide his eye-popping salary, he didn't (although he hinted that The King's counting room is darned near out of room).
Francesa repeated that he didn't want to come across as egotistical or jealous. He didn't. He came across as egotistical and jealous.
And then he took calls from listeners who pledged their allegiance to him, calls from those who declared their admiration and affection - even if at least one, conditioned to the Francesa treatment, was moved to beg, "Please don't cut me off."

MIKE HAS A NEW CO HOST... IT"S...

HARVEY FROM DIX HILLS...

What's the deal with this dude? I think that he is on every single day. Mike has already exhibited some of the Dogesque rage towards Harvey that could make for good radio. He treated his call about the PSL or whatever the hell he was talking about like it was Dog telling Mike to use a regular bathroom at Yankee Stadium.

The best comment from Harvey was when he asked Mike "How much screwing was done?"

This is how the Mike and Harvey show could start every day. Just imagine...

Theme Song: They're talking sports going at it as hard as they can. It's Mike and Harvey on the Fan. He's from Dix Hills, but Mike pays the bills. Mike and Harvey, WFAN.

Harvey: Great day in Dix Hills, and Mike let's start the show how we always do on the Mike and Harvey show. Mike, how much screwing was done?

Mike: Harvey, a lot of screwing.

And away we go.

MIKE HAS A NEW CO-HOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's Matt Higgins, the riveting Jets Exec VP of Business Operations. Higgins has been on for about 3 hours talking about the Jets PSL's and Mike has just announced that this topic is so important that Higgins is going to be a permanent fixture on the show and will be sitting in Russo's chair from now on. There will actually be a PSL on that chair which will cost Matt Higgins 25,000 a year to sit in it.

Can't you hear the new theme song:

They're talking PSL's going at it as hard as they can. It's Mike and Matt on the Fan. Nothing can get by them, turn it on it try em, Mike and Matt, WFAN!!!!

STAY TUNED - BIG DAY ON MIKE'D UP

Mike just gave us plenty of reason to stick around today:

"We'll have Matt Higgins from the Jets on to talk about this PSL thing and this auction that they're gonna have on Stubhub. We finally got him. He'll join us. We'll do some Ryder Cup stuff which will begin tomorrow."

Who else can't wait for day 81 of PSL talk? Who out there doesn't want 2 hours on the Ryder Cup? Big day at Mike'd Up...

THE CUBBIES, LOUIE AND ME KILLING MYSELF

If i hear Mike say Cubbies or Louie one more time you may no longer see Lt Sam on this blog because i will have done as Lt Markinson did and put a silver plated pistol in my mouth. Mike, calling the Cubs the Cubbies is not cool for Cubs fans except in the 7th inning stretch. His name is Lou Pinella. Lou. It's already short. It has three letters in it. You calling him Louie does not make us think that you guys are pals.

Another thing.. HIS NAME IS ROY HALLADAY.. NOT DOC! Come on. DOC? Really Mike, stop. What's next BRO-YO for Bronson Arroyo.

Another thing, when you have some guy on the air from Long Beach, how about trying this, just take a shot, humor me. Ask a question that doesn't include your biography in the question, or how about this, ask a question that doesn't take 20 minutes. Or another one, ask a question to a guy from Long Beach probably making the only appearance on NY radio in HIS LIFE, you think maybe this is a thrill for him, well then how about not bringing up the time that he broke CHASE UTLEY'S WRIST. JEEZ.

WHAT WE HAVE LEARNED TODAY

We have learned that the Mets don't wany any part of this fight right now. We have learned that Mike can't make Wright and Beltran the Met culprits right now. We have learned that Wright and Beltran can't buy a hit in a big spot (I thought we weren't making them the culprits). We have learned that the Phillies have gamers and the Mets do not. We have learned that the Mets don't know how to run the bases. We have learned that Mike is angry...uh, make that happy. We have learned that the manager has his hands full. We have learned that the Silent September might become a Silent October. We have learned that the Mets are tight. Not tight like Mike and Chris used to be. The other kind of tight. We have learned that the question for the day for Met fans is "does your team want any part of the Mets fight?" What we have not learned yet is whether or not Mike will launch into another defensive rant today about the lack of coverage he has received.

EARLY RETURNS

So we've all postulated that there is going to be a winner and a loser in this internecine battle between Mike Francesa and Chris Russo. Well, I'm coming to terms that this isn't really a battle for listeners. MMD has become apples and oranges. As our astute commenters have pointed out, Mike's show will always be rooted in New York Sports. Meanwhile, Russo answers to the 'heartland' now, among others. If you are a suffering Met fan, you want to tune into Mike today. Instead of self-flagellating, you can have Mike leave the scars for you. Russo will talk about the Mets, but as is apparent in the early days of his show, he is self-conscious about being too 'New York-centric'. He used this term to preface Mets talk yesterday.

So now that we have separated the Apple(Mike) from the Orange(Russo), we can look at this as a battle for legacy. When great teams break up, we look to see who will be remembered at the end of the day. George Michael was always the favorite to make it without Andrew Ridgely and that was borne out. You could call it a push with Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis, although I guess the Nutty Professor wins because he's still above ground. Obviously at this blog(contributors and commenters included), the smart money is on Christopher Russo. After yesterday, Russo has become the heavy chalk, with Francesa making like AIG stock. Here's why...

First the meltdown...The cracks are showing already at Mike'd Up. Francesa's rant is too long to dissect with a fine tooth comb. But here's the headline I got from it. "Francesa admits defeat in court of public opinion." Mike was proud of the fact that he never spoke up about the situation over the summer. He had set some arbitrary deadline of Chris' show airing to state his case. Meanwhile, Russo did what any person in his position would do - Get publicity for his new show. Mike's approach? Play the sad clown and sit on his hands. Well, he's basically staked Russo a lead. Too little too late, Mike.

Second - Resources. Around the 4pm hour, Francesa started pumping up Keith Hernandez's appearance..."If you're a Met fan, this is the person you want to hear from." I don't remember Mike ever being that excited about a local guest. Along with Keith, there was a Jon Heyman and Tom McCarthy. Meanwhile, Chris was trotting out John Madden, Regis Philbin and Barry Sanders. I'm guessing that the contact list over at Sirius XM is a bit more robust than Sal Licata's. Plus, if Bruce Springstein is doing an appearance on a music channel over there, you think Russo's people have a chance of walking him down the hallway to talk with Chris? Yesterday, Russo did a simulcast with Rob Dibble and Kevin Kennedy. It wasn't a phoner. They just linked up both of their channels. It was a nice changeup. And it showed you what kind of resources Sirius XM has.

So if I'm Arnold Rothstein, Paulie Walnuts or McGonaghy from that gambling movie and I'm taking odds on who wins the legacy battle, I'm putting it all on the Orange.

MIKEY YELLS AND NOTHING HAPPENS

I woke up this morning, turned on NY1 because i love that "In The Papers" segment. Helps me know what's happening in the front page without having to read it. It's like the reading version of breakfast in bed. So i got the smooth tones of Pat Kiernan going and i am moving through my morning routine of looking through the New York papers and by looking through i mean, sports pages, entertainment and page six. As i am going through this i am thinking there are going to be some articles about Mikey's big rant yesterday, everyone will have been talking about it and then writing about it the next day. I looked and I looked and I looked some more, I then by mistake turned on Mike and Mike, almost ran away like that teacher in Harlem who decided to "disappear" yet also checked her email at the Apple Store and showered at NY Sports Club, probably not the best way to vanish, but we all have our interpretations of the word.

After all that and much searching and googling (amazing how that is actually a real VERB, "googling") I realized that no one had written anything. This isn't exactly the "scream in the woods, does anyone hear you scenario." Mike screamed and ranted for 20 minutes on the #1 rated talk show in New York, called out people by name, and not a word was written. Mr Raissman had not one sentence in the Daily News. Neil Best still had his blog up from yesterday. Phil Mushnick was still upset about some obscure abbrevation of a team on ESPN's bottom line during Saturday college football.

Maybe it's true, the media doesn't like Mike. That doesn't seem far fetched. There were stories in every paper about Russo's debut on Sirius. Even USA Today had something. I don't mind that no one pays attention to Mike. I actually think it's a good thing, but it is a bit interesting that there was no coverage of it.

If you call in today, and don't give me this "I don't call radio shows" nonsense. Feel free to mention to Mike that no one seemed to care about his rant. That should start you off on a good note with the Big Fella.

A CALL TO ACTION

As many of you wrote in your comments, the Mike Francesa reaction to Raissman and all those who speak ill of him in the world caused a rash of "we love you Mike calls." What didn't happen was a little self reflection by Mike, a little bit of wondering, could my show be really boring without any guests and me repeating the same things over and over again? Could the fact that I have been back several weeks and still do not have even a new jingle for the show display a lack of focus or urgency to get an improved show on the FAN? Could my arrogance have caused people to want to write negatively about me? Nope.

But it needs to. Mike needs to know that the show that he has put on the air these last few weeks is substandard. Hey, Mike, i don't ever listen to the Sunday NFL show, but the one time I did, it was good. You wanna know why? You actually have guests and it's not just you talking the whole time. (i don't fully get his ridiculous claim about Saturday and Sunday radio ratings, but what can ya do. Do people say it's Saturday we can listen to the radio but on Sunday everyone is America has their radios turned off except for the few people that live in the town where Footlose happened and they just wanna dance and listen to sports radio and thus it's a way tougher rating? Who the F knows.)

Mike needs to know and we need to tell him. So this is a call to action. Tomorrow, pick up your phone, pretend that you are making a work call, while you are on hold have a fake conversation or two, but when you get through let Mike know that the reason he is being criticized is because he deserves it. If Mike came out of the gate with solo shows that were great listens, would we criticize him? OF COURSE. But somewhere we would give him credit. Maybe not me, but someone would. But Mike didn't do that. There was the Bar A travesty, there have been show upon show of unlistenable radio and then there was today.

It's not about what Raissman wrote, it's about what we think. If the voices of those who want to kiss his ass are being heard, just because they falsely believe it will mean a longer call, then the voices of discontent need to be heard to.

I am calling on you NEXTBESTTHING, and you KBILLY, and you FIRSTTIMELONGTIME, all of you who support this blog. You know the numbers, your fingers dialing them without thinking. Dial in tomorrow. Feel free to plug this blog. Express your feelings. Feel free to plug this blog again.

Mike and the Mad Blog: Change You Can Believe In. (like how you believe that the Jets were going to beat the Pats and that a 9th inning Mets lead is secure)

Neil Best transcribed Mike's rant. It can be found here:

http://weblogs.newsday.com/sports/watchdog/blog/2008/09/mike_francesa_gets_quite_a_few.html#more

WHAT HAVE WE LEARNED?

Here is a mixed bag. This is from both Russo and Francesa shows. And this post-Francesa outburst.

We have learned that Mike has aspirations to coach Little League and he has the money to buy the uniforms to boot. We have learned that Mike Francesa is the 'heartbeat of the nation' in the eyes of one listener. We have learned the Chris feels 'really comfortable' at Sirius XM. We have learned that Phil Mushnick has never liked Mike nor Chris, but Bob Raissman does Russo's bidding. We have learned that Mike doesn't trust people in Boston. We have learned that in the time that Mike interviewed Tom McMcarthy(who?), Russo trotted out John Madden and Regis Philbin. We have learned that for every Jon Heyman or Keith Hernandez that Mike has on, Chris has a Barry Sanders up his sleeve. We have learned that it is okay to call Mike 'Fatcesa' on Sirius XM, as one caller did today.

What we have not learned is what Russo's reaction to Mike's screed will be.

Ned Yost Ran Over Jon Heyman's Dog

Anyone notice the outright hatred and disgust that Jon Heyman has for Ned Yost? Every time Heyman is on, he talks about how he is not a fan of Yost. Earlier today, he did it again. He always mentions the fact that Yost got thrown out of 3 games last year as evidence he is not a good manager. Yes Jon, I am sure his getting tossed from 3 games last year is why the Brewers didn't make the playoffs and is also why they are struggling now. It can all be traced back to those ejections:

"He was ejected 3 times last year at the end of the season when they were certainly in the race, I think there was no question they needed to change managers. This team was absolutely collapsing...Milwaukee is just falling apart and I don't think Yost is the guy. I don't think he is the guy to bring them home..."

Anyone know what ever happened between Heyman and Yost? Something clearly must have gone down between the two...

MIKE WILL ALLOW JOBA TO START IF HE REALLY WANTS TO

Mike just said that if Joba really wants to start that he would leave it up to him and let him start. That is so nice of Mike. I am sure that Joba appreciates it. I think that Joba was wavering and uncertain if Mike was going to feel ok with everything after he defied Mike and went into the starting rotation.

Joba, you are ok to start now. Mike would prefer if you stayed in your room inside the bullpen because he feels that your body is suited for being a closer, just like his is suited for long sits in a chair and injesting large quantities of diet soda.

Joba, Mike has given you permission to start, but remember, if you start and fail or get hurt, Mike will be there, first in line, saying I TOLD YOU SO

MIKE MAKES HIS CASE

Mike apparently does pay attention to what people say about him. I turned him on at the same time I had Russo on, so I could write a little post called 'In Stereo'. And just as I tuned in, he was saying, 'we have 3 outlets bidding for this show. I wish Dog well. I have no animosity for him.' It was obvious that his blood was up and that this was going to be good. He didn't disappoint.

Mike went on to bash Bob Raissman and lash out at all the criticism that he has taken during the summer. He also subtly and not so subtly said that he was wearing the pants for 20 years. He mentioned that he rated better solo than Dog did over the years.

A good rhetorician can play different roles in an argument in his attempt to win the debate. And Mike did just that. Here are a few of the hats he wore:

Mike the victim.
"I was getting pounded...I was called all kinds of names."

Mike the disingenuous
"I'm only here because of you...I love the audience. I try to be respectful to the audience."

Mike the bully
"He's what you need to know about Raissman...I got Favre on. And all Raissman did was say that I bullied the Jets to get him on."

Mike the lawyer
"These are the hard facts...They are public record."

Mike at one point said, "Enough's enough." As we can see this story is just getting started.

THE GLOVES COME OFF

I caught this in the middle but Mike Francesa is ripping on Bob Raissman, Russo, the media. We will have more very shortly

Let us know your thoughts if you were listening.

GET YOUR MET COLLAPSE HERE...

As evidenced by today's open, few things make Mike more giddy than the Mets on the brink of a collapse. A Mets collapse means Mike doesn't have to talk about the Silent September in the Bronx. A Mets collapse means Mike doesn't have to be preoccupied by the rave reviews his ex partner's new show is receiving, while Mike'd Up stumbles out of the gate. A Mets collapse means Mike doesn't have to concern himself with the whereabouts of his new jingle. A Mets collapse means Mike doesn't have to look for ways to defend his friend Bill in Miami. A Mets collapse means Mike doesn't have to fret about the tailgating situation at Giants Stadium. A Mets collapse means Mike can put off his thoughts of where Joba belongs until next year. A Mets collapse means Mike can find time next week to take a shot at Bill Belichick. A Mets collapse means the next time Mike talks about Cano it might be in regards to the new team he is playing for. A Mets collapse means lots of Bob Heussler in studio with Mike. A Mets collapse means John Sterling gets a break from botching home run calls. A Mets collapse means Mike is giddy. A Mets collapse just might save Mike'd Up.

WAR OF THE ROSES

Well, the custody battle for their kids has officially started. Mike and Chris no longer have to fight it out sitting across from each other. They'll do it over the crackling and hissing of the radio and satellite waves. Their listeners are up for grabs. Anyone who reads the comments on this blog knows who's going to win this battle. But there is a whole nation out there that has to decide if they want a ferocious puppy yelling at them everyday.

Here is a good article covering Russo's maiden show yesterday from Richard Sandomir of the NY Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/16/sports/othersports/16sandomir.html?ref=sports

I'm not saying that Sandomir was reading our blog, but he did use a couple of things that we wrote about yesterday. (See 'preen' and 'Darth Varder'. Albeit, I got the 'Daeth' part wrong of the 'Darth Varder'.)

WWHL

A few things that we have learned from the first official Mad Dog Unleashed show:

We have learned that Ron from Virginia Beach knows who Chris Russo is and doesn't need it explained to him all the time. We have learned that Ed Hochuli 'preens'. We have learned that Gary Bettman knows he has to sit through the 19 negative questions by Russo to get to the one positive question. We have learned that satellite radio has not fixed Russo's malapropisms("LT with the Daeth Varder helmet on." We have learned that like Martin Short, Joe Torre is not a strong swimmer. We have learned that Chris has a quick trigger finger with callers on his new show. We have learned that the Fan was too cheap to pay for usage rights for Springstein songs. We have learned that although we pay for no commercials on satellite radio and yet we still get them(I have XM and there are no commercials outside of show promos.) We have learned that Dog thinks that to connect with 'the heartland', he must talk more about college football.

CANINE CLICHES

So far the new Chris Russo show has been good. But could ya please with all the dog analogies? Mad Dog Unleashed is not the catchiest show title I've ever heard. And do the updates really need to be called 'sports bites'? And they are accompanied by a sound effect of, get this, a dog barking and then chomping. Get it? He's a Mad Dog. On the XM website there is a mention of Mad Dog's 'rabid' fans. Very clever.

This old dog has some new fleas. I'll admit that the pacing and production quality is faster and hipper than WFAN. But that's not saying much. 660 is stuck in a time warp. Despite the pedestrian dog theme, the show itself is doing very well.

AT 2pm THE CHOICE IS YOURS

We have all had tough choices in our lives and today, we are presented with perhaps the most critical decision you will ever make. More critical than this whole Presidential election, or what name you give your kid, or whether to pick Brenda or Kelly, or put in Luis Ayala or Joe Smith, or sign AROD to 10 more years despite his inability to perform in the clutch or to use the regular bathrooms at Yankee Stadium or the ones meant for the press. This is way more important than that. This is for your well being. This is for your ears. Your state of mind. This decision is for YOU. We don't take these things lightly and we don't believe you should either.

2PM, you will have a choice. Chris Russo or Mike Francesa. What will you do? How will you decide? Will you provide us with your Sirius XM password and login?

These are dire times and this may be the most important decision you make between 2PM and 2:01 PM. Please choose wisely.

RUTGERS RAN OVER MIKE'S DOG

Mike Francesa has just gone on an anti-Rutgers screed. We've heard Mike rip into people before. But this is extraordinary. "Hey Rutgers fans. Your team is a fraud." Mike, we might need to get you security. Do you really want to challenge New Jersey state pride? Now I'm not from Jersey, but even I am taking umbrage at this all-out assault on this university. What exactly prompted this? Did Continent piss in Mike's Diet Coke? Did Schiano bone Roe? Did Rutgers alumni James Gandolfini and Mario Batali kill one of his horses? Whatever it is, Mike is not having any of Rutgers.

There really must be some sort of backstory. Anyone have any answers? This is like when Ralphie beat that stripper to death in the Sopranos. No one is willing to step in to stop this nonsense. Please. For the love of god.

BREAKING NEWS

Associated Press - Van Halen to record the new Mike'd Up jingle. For any listeners who just heard host Mike Francesa playing some sample jingles for his new show, Francesa was enamored with one in particular. The jingle, which played on the words "Mike'd Up" had a certain familiar sound to it. Van Halen just confirmed that the jingle was in fact not a rip-off of "Right Now" but actually that the original lyrics to "Right Now" were "Mike'd Up" named after founding bassist Michael Anthony. Lead singer David Lee Roth said "We are proud that the song is being used in its' original version for something as rocking as Francesa on the Fan." Once again, for those that were crying rip-off at home, you need not worry.

Mike's Top 10 Reasons Yanks Failed

Today Mike has opened the show talking about the Yankees failure this year. So here is our take on Mike Francesa's Top 10 Reasons the Yankees Failed This Year:

10. They never ever dealt for Bronson Arroyo
9. Cano apparently didn’t have a lot of hits left in his bat
8. Johnny Damon dropped 2 balls in center
7. Abreu’s wall-phobia cost the Yanks big time
6. A-Rod is not a gamer
5. Yanks mishandled the Joba situation
4. Melky Cabrera should have never been an everyday center fielder
3. The Sweeny Murti Jinx
2. Talk to me in August
1. Two words: Bronson Arroyo

THE RADIOTHON

A day for doing good. A day to give back. A day to help others. A day for the less fortunate. A day for Good will. And so where do we start?

"Good afternoon everybody..these headphones are no good. As we try another one here. Hold on folks we just got to get a headset that works here..hopefully these do. (scolding a worker) Just give me the headset...thank you, there we go (Voice RAISING), JUST GO AHEAD AND GIVE ME THE HEADSET PLEASE! GOD ALMIGHTY!!"

Nice job Mike. On the day that is about others, you start out in typical fashion by berating others. Memo to the show: Perhaps you guys should test the equipment, say, before the show starts...

Jerry Manuel Report

Now that we are through 9 segments with Linda Cohn, we are about 40 minutes away from the Jerry Manuel report. In that time, Mike will likely take 2-3 calls, talk about his kids' first day at school, mention that Obama has gotten himself in trouble and do some Yankees play-by-play. But when he does get to Jerry, let's predict some of the things that will happen:

- How many questions will Mike ask Jerry that have already been answered in the papers this week?
- How many times will Jerry Manuel laugh?
- How many times will Mike answer the question that he asks Jerry before letting Manuel respond?
- How many times will Mike ask Manuel a question he has already asked him this season ("Jerry, do you think you need to make the playoffs to get a contract?")
- How many times will Mike preface a Carlos Delgado question with "Jerry, we all thought he was done..."

JINGLE ALL THE WAY

Any day now, CNN, MSNBC, FOX News, are all going to be talking about the new jingle for Mike'd Up, Francesa on the Fan, whatever the show is called.
One thing i quickly learned during Mike's brief discussion with a caller about the progress on the new jingle is that the "jingle companies do not work in August." Did someone in the jingle industry die in August and that is why all jingle companies take the month off? Can the jingle industry really be that successful that they can afford to not work an entire month? When you are working all year making up jingles for Charmin, 1800 Matress and others, does it just fry your brain to the level of a guy with a high end crank addiction that you just need to check out, go to Bali for a month and just get all jingles out of your brain? If you know more about this please tell me.

A little research on that magical invention called Google uncovered that a company called JAM Creative Productions created the original jingle and according to Mike they are hard at work, after their August hiatus creating a new jingle. BUT there is competition... From an average Joe like you and I, who has created a jingle that's got Mike humming it's tune. Mikey likes it and well this jingle just might make the show.

Congrats Average Joe. We are proud of you. We hope you win because if you do, it will be a win for all of us that work in August and for every caller who suggested something to Mike and simply was waved away.

Here's what Mike had to say about the state of the jingle:

"There’s not a contest. What happened was the jingle companies didn’t work in August (hmm, sound familiar?), so they are now producing the new stuff for the show. Now since then, somebody sent in some new stuff, who was actually a, he was a professional musician and he sent in some stuff which was not asked for and it turned out that they played it for me and it was really good. And so we called the guy up and we said “we need you to change the lyrics a little here and change the lyrics a little here” and he said “I’ll gladly go in the studio and get it back to you within a couple of days.” Well we haven’t gotten it back yet but the guy sent over some really interesting, interesting stuff. And if somebody does send us something that’s good, we’ll acknowledge it and we may even use it and we would pay you for it. I mean, so we’re still looking. But not stuff that you’re gonna do in your garage though. It’s got to be professional stuff.”

The Bronson Arroyo Factor

I'm a bit behind today, but just got through about 2 minutes of Mike's open when I was compelled to start blogging. Where does Mike go at the outset of the show today? Well, first a quick dig on the Yanks, than an even quicker mention of Delgado and the Mets with the "these games shouldn't be that close" for the Mets comment. But yes, with that official business aside, time to turn to the real story of the day:

“The Brewers have an enormous game this afternoon. Sabathia vs Bronson Arroyo and I know everyone got on me about Arroyo (everyone = US)...well check it out, Arroyo over his last 5 starts, his ERA is under 2 and he’s 14-10 and his ERA is in the 4’s. So he couldn’t have helped the Yankees this year? He won 14 games so far, 14-10 on a team that’s 15 games under .500. So I think he would have helped this year and he has pitched GREAT of late.”

Who would have thunk it - another Bronson Arroyo mention? And Mike, just to clarify, that ERA is a hell of a lot closer to 5 than it is to 4. And nice job neglecting the 190 hits he has allowed in 173 innings. And the 25 homers allowed. Surely, those numbers would have decreased in the AL...But anyway, let's start the over/under on how many more Arroyo mentions we will have to endure the rest of the season. I'm going with 17...

RUSSO ON LETTERMAN

Here is a brief clip of Russo on Letterman last night. Russo's hands are out of control

http://lateshow.cbs.com/latenight/lateshow/video_player/index/php/964542.phtml

RUSSO ON STERN: WHAT WE HAVE LEARNED

Christopher Russo appeared on the Howard Stern show on Sirius this morning and oh boy did we learn a few things. We learned that Russo had to buy the name "Mad Dog" from WFAN for $1. We learned that Russo still hasn't talked to Mike. We learned that Russo has a slight gambling issue, betting 25,000 on a game once. We learned that Russo has sex with his wife once a week. We learned that he will not curse on his Sirius show. We learned that he made 2 million dollars at WFAN plus another 500,000. We learned that it is not easy for Russo to curse. We learned in one short appearance, once again, that we cannot wait till Russo's radio show hits Sirius.

BIG SPOT

Mike and Chris have always been fans of the term 'big spot'. Mike has been talking about it again today. We wanted broaden the reach outside the world of sports to look at people who have or haven't come up in a big spot:

Jesus: Huge. Crucifixion, resurrection, the whole bit. Name one person who came up bigger in a big spot.
Britney: It will be interesting to see after her embarrassing appearance at the 2007 MTV VMA Awards, if she can bounce back and come up in a big spot at this year's awards. She's got a little karma going.
General Custer: Obviously we can't trust him in a big spot anymore.
Spanish Armada: I am very down on them. They were like the 90's Texas Rangers. Great in the regular season and chokers in the playoffs.
Jack Bauer: Agent Bauer probably rivals Jesus as far as trusting someone in a big spot.
Pie-Oh-My: This horse came up big for Ralphie and Tony twice. Mike definitely trusts Pie-Oh-My in a big spot and will key her in trifecta regularly.
John Holmes: Alllllways good in a big spot.
Ghostbusters: Who you gonna call?
Spuds McKenzie: Do I really need to explain this one?
Lt. Jo Galloway: We were all a little worried about her in a big spot after she 'strenuously objected' to Commander Stone's testimony. But she came up big after she shut down Jack Ross with 'rebuttal witness, your honor, called specifically to refute testimony offered under direct examination.' Lt. Sam Weinberg gave her a knowing nod after that clutch moment.
Charlie Brown: Get it together man. Kick it one time, please.

FORGET PAVANO

Mike was just talking about Brian Cashman and some of the bad pitching moves he has made recently:

"Okay, they went and got Marte. I'll give you that...But if you go back over the last 5 years and you start to bring in the pitchers...and forget Pavano because we all would have brought him in. But if you go and think about some of the moves that he's brought in from bringing in Wright and bringing in Kevin Brown and bringing in Weaver, and you go down the line and all these guys that...Hawkins, all these guys that's he brought in, he's brought in a lot of lousy pitchers over the last 5 years. A lot."

But the thing that Mike tries to bury here is the line "Forget Pavano because we all would have brought him in." That is a classic case of Francesa being dismissive about something that HE was wrong about. Now I am not arguing that it was a bad decision to bring in Pavano, but I am pointing out that whenever something that Mike is a proponent of backfires, he always finds a way to duck the heat. And he does it in a subtle way like this. Earlier today, talking about the Vikings/Colts game this coming weekend, Mike said that the Colts were a bad matchup for Minnesota because of the Vikings pass defense. Now come Monday morning if that prediction doesn't hold true, Mike will find a way to escape that proclamation. I can just hear it now "Now listen Minnesota shut down Peyton Manning, but we all thought that was a bad matchup for the Vikings secondary..."

Yep Mike, WE ALL have the same thoughts as you when you're wrong about something. But when you're right, it's all you Mikey.

Thanks For Taking My Call

Is there anything worse than the callers that tell Mike "Thanks for taking my call?" It happened a little while ago. I mean, really, what are you thanking Mike for? All he is doing is pushing a button. He's not even the person that is screening the call. Why in the world are you thanking him? Do you think he sat there thinking "Oh yeah. That call looks good. Nope, let's skip that one. Oooh, another good one here that we should take.." No, he is not doing any of that. So if you really want to thank anybody, thank Sal Licata or Eddie Erickson for letting you on. But I wouldn't even thank them. That's their job - to let callers get on with Mike, so they don't really deserve thanks either. But now you're left sitting there thinking "If I can't thank Mike, and I can't thank Sal or Eddie, who else can I thank? I really want to thank someone?" Thank yourself. After all, you're the one that spent 57 minutes hitting redial until you got through.

Can you say Co-Host On Deck

Today Mike finally addressed the fact that his "new show" ain't exactly new. Specifically, he promised "someone" new very soon..

"And then I get asked about "where's the show. Where's all your guys?" I'm working on it. Listen, I'm putting together. I mean I just spent 19 years in the room with one guy...so you got to give me a little while to get through everybody. I'm trying to be fair...We are moving along at a rapid pace and we want to do this once and be done with this. This is not something we can do in 10 minutes. I mean I intend on being here in the room with the person for the next 6 or 7 years probably. I mean I already agreed to stay for another 5 1/2. I mean I might want to stay a couple minutes after that...who knows. So I know you are impatient. I know you wanna hear who it is and see who it is, we're working on it. I promise you. Feverishly. We are working on it."

What's interesting here is that Mike first declared that he would NEVER have a co-host again. But today he admitted "I intend on being here in the room with the person for the next 6 or 7 years probably.." Interesting change of course here. Could it be that Chernoff realized the show was a sinking ship without a co-host? Whatever the case, time to start your predictions. I'm thinking it is going to be somebody somewhat shocking...perhaps a Sid Rosenberg. Throw out your guesses...

THE DEPARTMENT WHERE THEY KEEP THE BABIES

Today Mike opened the show talking about sending his twins off to school for the first time. Mikey reminisced about when the twins were born prematurely and visiting them in the hospital..Problem was Mike couldn't quite remember what that "department" where they kept the babies was called:

"Jack was 4 pounds. Emily was 3 1/2 pounds and that winter...I used to go across every night and feed them. They were in the hospital for 2 weeks. And I used to go across and feed them when they were in the uhhh, you know that, uhhh I can't even think of the word now, you know where little babies stay in the uhhh, I can't even remember the word, what is that department called? What do they call that place, you know where they keep the babies down there when they are premature...I should slap myself for not being able to think of the word."

What could that department possibly be called? Marshalls? JC Penny? Frozen foods? Mensware?

Here's a clue Mikey...Wait for it...wait for it...combine the term Neonatal with the term Intensive Care Unit and guess what you get: NICU. That's the answer Mike!

THE ATROCITY OF THE MIKE AND MIKE AND MIKE ESPN MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL BROADCAST

I will begin by saying that I did not watch much of the Raiders Broncos football game last night but when I did tune in (somewhere in between Gossip Girl and Weeds) I heard what I thought perhaps was a continuation of the Bar A auditions. The combination of Mike Greenberg, Mike Golic and Mike Ditka was unbearable. Did these guys even rehearse? They talked over each other constantly, they provided little or no insight and basically did not belong in a broadcast booth. I believe the last time ESPN had MNF doubleheader the broadcasters included Dick Vermil and Ron Jaworski, who actually have broadcast football games and know what they are talking about.

To me, with a broadcast team like the 3 Mikes, ESPN was saying a few things:
1. It's the NFL and we know you, the fan will watch anything we throw up there even if it includes completely unseasoned, untrained broadcasters mucking it up throughout the game
2. IT'S MIKE AND MIKE: Everyone loves them. Well, sorry to say but that's not really true. I kind of can't bare listening to them and to just blindly believe that you can throw those guys with no experience into a booth and do football games is disrespectful to the people that actually treat broadcasting as a craft and to the fan who actually expects something more during the game.
3. MIKE DITKA, YOU SO CRAZY: Essentially ESPN was relying on the old trick of let's put someone crazy in the booth and everyone will stick around for them to say something crazy. That worked out tremendously with Dennis Miller.

Ok, ESPN you want to experiment, you wanna do some FUN STUFF, maybe not as fun as Titletown or 50 States in 50 Days, fine. Do something fun. But how about this, how about at the least putting a seasoned play by play guy in the booth to handle the heavy lifting, to take us through the game. Maybe go INSANE because you really want this THREE Mike thing because it's super clever, so go FOUR PERSON BOOTH! Mike and Mike and Mike and even go another Mike and have Mike Tirico doing the play by play on the Madden Cruiser while driving to the game. I'm sure we could get the live feed hooked up in there. It would be INSANE! A RATINGS GRABBER! Maybe Sal Palontonio could do his sideline reports from the highway exits as the Madden Cruiser passes important exits. Sportsnation will be going crazy, Bill Simmons will do a live diary that will mention pop culture AND sports!

Yup, ESPN, just think, you were only one Mike short of taking an atrocious idea and making it an incredibly entertaining train wreck.

FINAL HOURS: TAKE US HOME

I am asking you, readers of this little blog of ours, take us down the stretch run of Mike'd Up today as i am going to begin showing my true affection for Chris Russo by watching the finals of the US Open. American men's tennis died with Pete Sampras and Andre Agassi, but still i have a place in my heart for the tournament in Flushing Meadow.

Before i go, some suggestion of things to discuss inside and outside of sports if you are so inclined :

1. The new 90210, most importantly Shannen Doherty and whether she is still hot, never was hot, and was Brenda Walsh ever really a good enough actress to return to as a drama teacher. (i know this falls under "guy talk" so let's stay above the fray and keep it clean and smart and high brow, by using big words and Shakespeare references or Ibsen or Beckett)
2. The fall of HBO: Are there must watch shows on HBO anymore (outside of Flight of the Concordes? Was not impressed by True Blood, Entourage lacked zip, what's left?)
3. Joe Girardi: I have yet to understand why he deserves a pass for this year. Please explain. If the Yankees finish in fourth place how does Girardi at least not take the hit by being on a very short rope next year. Would Joe Torre have won with the same roster and same cirumstances?
4. Real World Road Rules Challenge: The Island: One thing you must know about Lt Sam Weinberg, he loves himself some reality tv, especially the Real World. Kevin Powell, member of the first Real World Cast is running for some political office in New York. Eric Neiss unfortunately is not his running mate. BUT, the Real World Road Rules Challenge: The Island debuts next week and it's very important that you watch this. More important than the presidential debates or eating. I also will go on record and state that the Real World Road Rules Challenge should be included in the next Olympics.

The forum is yours. Bash Mike, love Mike, say he's boring, says he riveting, talk about your new Sirius subscription or the password and login you are stealing for us. Say whatever you wish, keep it clean, or at least disguised as clean, and enjoy.

4:19 MIKE MENTIONS THE YANKEES

If you had 4:19 in the "when will Mike mention the Yankees pool" then you win something. If you actually had a pool for that then you might want to get help or congratulate yourself. Either way, great job out of whoever you are.

Mike also christened this final month for the Yankees with a name: THE SILENT SEPTEMBER. It sounds like a movie title.

SILENT SEPTEMBER: Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez play mutes in this sequel to Children of a Lesser God, which tells the story of two high priced New York Yankees baseball players who are unable to express their screams of agony as the constantly hit into double plays.

IS THIS WHAT A GOOD FRANCESA ON THE FAN SHOW LOOKS LIKE?

Taking a look at our comments it seems that several of you believe today to be an example of what a good solo Mike Francesa show looks like. It's Monday and Mike in his wheelhouse with the "epic" first week of the NFL, the Brady injury, a little Mets breakdown, Phil Simms spot, and no mention of the Yankees. He takes some calls, talks to Sal and Eddie a little, gives his review of Entourage and rips on SNY for not having a post game show after the Mets yesterday.

After just writing that paragraph it seems like a pretty full show, yet i still feel that something is wrong with these solo shows and I believe it can be found in a word. SOLO. I know, i know, Mike and Chris are not getting back together, BUT it is crystal clear to me that Mike NEEDS someone to talk to, Mike NEEDS a voice in there to break up his, we need a secondary character. Eddie and Sal are more like extras with a few lines, which i think after a while can get them their SAG cards.

So while this might be what a good Mike'd Up solo show sounds like, i am not certain this is good radio. Actually let me correct myself, maybe it's good radio, but it's not, in my opinion, compelling radio. But what do you think? Is this the kind of show you want from Mike? You cool with this version of Mike'd Up?

WOW THE BILL BELICHICK PRESS CONFERENCE

I think that hell might be covering a Bill Belichick press conference. I think that everyone knows he's a huge A HOLE but just sitting here and listening to his press conference, it's amazing to watch how he waits several seconds before answering questions to come up with the most DICKISH answer possible.
Did someone do something so awful to him at one point that he has to be such an enormous dick?
The idea of imagining him, Parcells and Francesa in a room together is mind exploding. I actually don't know if it's really possible, if the earth could handle it. Could you imagine being the waiter at a restaurant serving the three of them? Then add Parcells pal, Bobby Knight to the mix.
Dudes like this make you question karma. Why does someone like Bill Belichick get to have all the success that he has had? I know I am getting philsophical here for probably eight seconds too long, and maybe he contributes to some charity that helps rich people puppies, but come on now, there has got to be someone else out there that deserves five Super Bowl rings more than this guy.

MIKE REVIEWS ENTOURAGE

As Mike tries contain his glee at the potential career ending injury to Billy Wagner, he gave us this glimpse into HBO's Entourage.

"I know what Entourage is ok... Don't give me this Entourage. It is not as good the other HBO shows. Secondly the guy who think he is the prettiest thing in the world, he's awful that guy. He thinks he's a pretty boy with the flowing black hair. What's his name Greiner or something like that. I've seen that show. I am not as high on it as you guys are."

There you have it. You should probably stop watching and pick up your JFK bios.

THE TEAM THAT SHALL NOT BE MENTIONED

How the mighty have fallen. In the opening two segments of the show Mr Francesa has mentioned the Giants, Jets, Kansas and Nebraska football, almost every NFL football team, along with the Mets and Billy Wagner.
But the team that was almost no hit by the Seattle Mariners, the team in fourth place in the AL East, the team that was just waiting to make it's yearly run and unseat those frauds the Tampa Bay Rays, the team known as the New York Yankees, they have received no mention by Mr Francesa.

How far into the show will we go before Mike mentions the Yankees? 2pm? Prior to the 2:40 flash? How about 3pm when Ed Coleman makes an appearance from one of the only remaining pay phones in New York. If he mentions the Yankees, will Mike also use the word "slipping" to describe the Rays? Will he mention his "bromance" with Bronson Arroyo? Or will he simply ignore them?