Friday, July 25, 2008

What We Have Learned Today from The Lenny D. Report

We have learned that Lenny Dykstra says that Davey Johnson was only a good manager because he had good players. We have learned that he claims he never did steroids. We have learned that he is most definitely on some sort of drug during this interview. We have learned that Mike Francesa is incapable of letting another person finish a thought without cutting them off. We have learned that Dykstra's friends and family ripped him off. We have learned he was invested in real estate while still playing baseball (for some reason that was interesting to Mike). We have learned that Dykstra was always ahead of the curve. We have learned that Dykstra turned a $1 million investment house into $20 million. We have learned that Nails always surrounds himself with an army of attorneys. We have learned that Dykstra's attorney bills are $200,000 per month. We have learned that Mike's coach talk ("they played Cover 2, use a 3 or 4 and pick and roll") applies to business too ("so you subdivide this, put some retail on there.."). We have learned that Lenny is a big liver. We have learned that Dykstra is flipping Gretzky's house. We have learned the property taxes on The Great One's house are $300,000. We have learned again that Lenny is a stock-picking maven. What we have not learned is why, with a big Red Sox/Yanks series on tap starting tonight, is Lenny Dykstra your first guest interview of the day?

19 comments:

bigjf said...

As...interesting...as that hour was, it annoys me that it was ONLY about making professional athletes money. I understand a lot of them can use that kind of guidance, but how about the "common" man? I'd like a piece of those investments if I had the time and intuition...Leave it to Mike to conduct such an elitist interview. Now go back to watching the horse races on TV, Mike. And don't even bother watching Yanks/Boston tonight, because it's a meaningless series, "unless someone gets swept."

I miss Doggie. I hope Mike leaves.

gabagool said...

The reason Mike had Dystra on was so that he could talk to Dystra, not to really hear what he had to say (as evidenced by him cutting the stoner off every other sentance) but so that he could use his MONEY TALK like he uses his SPORTS TALK to show listeners how much he knows about financial matters, in fact, he could be a world class stock picker himself if he really wanted.

And what I just posted is in NO WAY an exaggeration.

gabagool said...

Elitist.....perfect.

Trust me, that tub of shit ain't happy unless he feels ABOVE everyone else.

More like floating above....

hmptonbys said...

didn't we learn that it takes gonads?

Bill.... from Hauppauge said...

It was like some sort of "Infomercial"

bigjf said...

Perhaps Mike is looking to leave sports talk? Maybe he and Joe Buck will link up to do Fox Business.

We all win then.

Anonymous said...

Just remember...as we heard multiple times...Mikey and Lenny were friends way back in the '80s.

Mikey was THIS close to claiming credit for Lenny being so smart, as a result.

David said...

Just remember...as we heard multiple times...Mikey and Lenny were friends way back in the '80s.

Mikey was THIS close to claiming credit for Lenny being so smart, as a result.

First Time, Long Time said...

mike didnt know how to respond when lenny said "you gotta have balls"

that statement couple with this hour long interview must mean chernoff is jumping out of a window somewhere

bigjf said...

Please don't take any more calls from Benny in the Bronx.

Bill.... from Hauppauge said...

poor Benny, spilled his guts out to him

leapin' lanny poffo said...

Mike should have seen where the Benny call was going when he asked him what kind of car his mother had, and he said "a blue one."

bigjf said...

We've now learned Mike wants McLouth in CF for the next 10 years. He is 27 years old, has played 137 games in one of his 3+ years of big league experience, has a career OPS of .802. The guy is a decent player, but Mike's willing to trade Hughes, Jackson, and Melky. Does he even know who AJax is? Then he'll say what a horrible trade it was once Hughes starts living up to his hype.

bigjf said...

Oh, and the second reason Mike listed for wanting McLouth? "He has long, blonde hair." So Mike wants an Aryan in CF. Either that or he's exploring his sexuality. Now excuse me while I go vomit like Benny in the Bronx.

joe said...

I agree completely, the game is about the game not about money. I'm going to go watch some http://www.digitalfuntown.com for real entertainment.

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Karen Jungblut said...

Oh man, this better get archived.

yam said...

"Dykstra is a big liver." He sounded like he made his liver a little bigger before he went on the air.

gabagool said...

Yam

Haaaa Haaa! So farkin true.