Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Where Will Mike Start?

While some may feel that today is a tricky day for Francesa on the Fan, I disagree. Some might contend that with the Mets beating the Phils last night, that takes some heat off Mikey's fastball as he can't go too crazy about the Phillies lineup of gamers off a loss. And because his boyfriend Johan pitched a spotty game, he can't go on and on about Mr. Santana. But, that gives Mike the perfect opening to lead with the Yanks. And even though Mike's beloved pinstriped heroes lost last night, some (myself included) would argue that Mike took some joy in this defeat. First off, his other boyfriend Beckett came up huge in a big spot. Next, Mr. Pie face himself, AJ Burnett, came up small. On days like today, Mike will remind viewers that he was never a fan of the AJ signing. Now if Burnett had pitched a big game, he would just point out that "Burnett always pitches well against Boston.." But the bigger issue here is that over a month ago, Mike put the Yankees season on the brink of collapse. He argued that Arod coming back would not save this team - that they were old, Mariano needed a new pitch, something was missing, the seats need to be filled, the economy was bad, blah, blah, blah. But a funny thing then happened. The Yankees started to dominate and Mike avoided giving them praise. Instead, he turned guns blazing towards the Mets and just sort of avoided Yankee talk. When he was forced to commend the team that plays in Coors Field East, Mike pointed to an easy schedule. But today with the Mets beating the Phils and the Yanks losing yet again to Boston, this gives him the perfect opening to go off on the Bombers. "This is why Boston is better!! You can take your pies in the face, I'll take Beckett!! This team is missing something!! This is why Boston is better!!! Joba needs to be in the bullpen!! The Yankees have no heart when it comes to Boston!! Melky's a fourth outfielder!! Their lineup is old!! Bring it on Mike....


Loki said...

He will destroy the Yankees.

Ryan T. said...

Wow... 2 mins in and it's as if First Time Long Time has written the script for Mikey. Nice work.

He even mentioned the pie!

Jimmy said...

really impressive prediction. I read your post 5 minutes after turning mike on, and it really is as if you wrote it all down for him

Anonymous said...

Great call FTLT


Anonymous said...

Wow. Right on the money.

Bill.... from Hauppauge said...

On & on about Santana, yes he can and he is. Enough!! It's as if he has to prove that he is right about Santana by going on & on. Hey Mike you are wrong. Santana can never be as good as you say. He only goes 6, sometimes 7. Last night was his typical effort, complete with throwing his manager under the bus. What was Santana complaing about?? That should be the topic. How many times has he pitched past 7? The answer is ZERO. How come??

Anonymous said...

Hey, I called it, too in the comments on the "Remotes" entry. I didn't do as thorough a job as FTLT, but I want some credit damnit and I want it now!

Nah guys, I'm just joshing. Predicting what Tubby would rant about in general yesterday was easy. FTLT gets credit for being so specific.

Good day for Bitch Tits today. Yanks lose to Boston again, Hughes gives up a homer to his boyfriend Youk, and the Mets lose in extra frams to the Phils. It's on a silver platter.

I have a great idea for a call to Mike today, if anybody wants to. It would be more attractive for a Yanks fan, but anybody could do it. Tell him that last year the Angels went 8-1 against the Sox, so the Sox must have been unable to beat them, right Mike? What happened in the ALDS? He may play the experience card on you here. He may try to argue that the record in the reg. season didn't matter then because the Sox have Youk, the dwarf Pedroia, Beckett, et al. Then remind him about '07 when the Tribe, a team with no playoff experience, went 0-7 in the regular season vs. the far more accomplished Yanks, then dumped the NYY in 4 games in the ALDS. Tell him that what's happening with the Yanks and Sox isn't really all that big of a deal becaus as you can see, it has no bearing upon matchups in October. Take the wind out of his sails a little.

Please someone do that call. I beg of you!

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure what Mike will say about the Mets other than they let one get away. He may compare the Jayson Werth play to the Nick Swisher play (both great catches).

Mike will concentrate his frustrations on the Yankees again and make it seem like C.C. Sabathias entire purpose for being born is to "come up big tonight" and secure a WIN. He'll naturally discuss all things Wang and spend too much time on the need for a bullpen even though besides a HR Hughes pitched well.

Mike will give credit to "tippee toe" Mark Teixeria and say he is deserving of a pie in the face from "ace of cake" Burnett despite the loss.

I'm not sure if I can tolerate 5 hours of Fatso in panic mode!

Anon- you're on the money in that these games are'nt as important as Mike makes them out to be other than some hurt egos amongst Yankee players and fans. The Yanks have the greatest offensive lineup I have ever seen put on the field. Their pitching has shown signs of weakness but may turn it all around come playoff time. I give very little credence to Yankee pitching since no lead is too big to overcome for that Yankee offense thus all the come from behind wins this year.

Add to that the fact that the Yanks will "buy" whatever pieces to the puzzle they need to win a world series.

Yes the Red Sox are good but its a race to the end of October between them and the Yanks.

My original prediction still stands that the Yankees fate will be determined by Mr. April A-Rod and weather or not his cancer spreads to the clubhouse and if he'll show up with his bat in the postseason.

What Mike says now is totally irrelevent!


gabagool said...

Ha ha haaaaaaa!! Bitch Tits! Thats great. Why the hell didn't I think of that??! And I've thought it every single time he stuggles to get out of his chair......

Great job.

gabagool said...

Ha ha haaaaaaa!! Bitch Tits! Thats great. Why the hell didn't I think of that??! And I've thought it every single time he stuggles to get out of his chair......

Great job.

Mike would MUCH RATHER be right about the Yanks sucking wind than them doing great.

Its ALWAYS about Mike. Thats why his show sucks my huevos.

Why or why can't there be another NY sports talk show that comes in clearer than Kays?? Oh, the horror.

gabagool said...

Sorry about the double. I'm such a dumbfuck.

gman26 said...

Why is it that every Met loss is a 'tough' one? Do the Yanks have tough losses? Or just the Mets?

gman26 said...

What's with his constant laughing? Do the Mets amuuuuse you?

Again, he uses the term 'Bizarre' to describe the Mets.

Anonymous said...

Mike finally had something intelligent to say:

How in the world did the Mets not score 2 runs with the bases loaded last night???

I was screaming at the TV myself.

Razor Shine is a JOKE!!!!