Saturday, June 27, 2009

RIP Good Jokes and the Subway Series

Mike Jackson's death rid us of a prime joke source. As a memorial, I thought I'd share some jokes that I got yesterday...Some are old and receycled, but still good:

- When is it bedtime at the Neverland Ranch? When the big hand touches the little hand.
- Jockeys at todays races will wear black armbands out of respect for Michael Jackson who successfully rode more 3 year olds than anyone in memory.
- Due to the fact that Michael Jackson was 99% plastic, he'll be melted down and made into Legos so kids can play with him for a change.
- In honor of his passing, the school chancellor of NY ordered all childrens pants be held at half mast

So, circulate and enjoy.

Well, I have to give the NYY fans a chance to sound off. It was a merciless drubbing and I honestly think Mets will be lucky to get a win this weekend. Burnett can be had and so can Wang so we'll see. Excellent defense by the Mets last night, especially in the 2nd. I can see Mike chortling to himself as he recalls that debacle on Monday. Really, have you ever seen anything resembling what Evans did on that grounder from Texeira? That was unique, you must admit.


Anonymous said...

We'll certainly get a "the Met defense was BIZARRE" or if Mike is real cocky he may want to say that the entire Met infield "pulled a CASTILLO".

My cell phone was filled with the MJ jokes yesterday. I certainly respect, admire, and appreciate his talent but that's about as far as it went with me.


AwesomeSean said...

Yeah, not even sure I can get to: respect, admire and appreciate. Just not my thing. The jokes, on the other hand, are awesome.

Oh, yeah, especially if Mets get swept. What a gruesome game for a Mets fan.

Anonymous said...

As a Met fan I'm bracing for a sweep yet I still like the way these Triple A'ers are playing and showing some grit.

As long as the Phils keep helping us out we still might have a chance once "the Core" returns. Of course this will be the ultimate test for them and if they don't get it done I'll be supporting Mikes position to break them up come the fall.

As a die hard Springsteen fan who had to deal with the Born in the USA vs. Thriller album debate back in the day I succumbed to MJ talent(especially the dance moves). It was like Met fan vs. Yankee fan debates(lol).

I'm more of an earlier Bruce fan(Born to run/Darkness on the edge of town/etc). Musically speaking I think both Thriller and BITUSA were nothing but commercial albums meant to generate sales.

As far as MJ's personal issues.... I better just bite my tongue.


Loki said...

Didn't see the game. I was working. To be honest, I'm not watching much games lately.

KBilly said...

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic grocery bag?

One is dangerous for children to play with and the other you put your groceries in.

bigjf said...

I've got two that were sent to me, other than the Lego one:

1) When Farah Fawcett died, she went to Heaven and asked God to protect all the children on Earth, so God killed MJ.

2) Autopsy on MJ showed he died of food poisoning. Turns out he frequently ate 15-year old nuts.

bigjf said...

As for the Subway Series, last night was a good win for the Yanks. Tonight, Burnett can be had, but Redding is an even bigger candidate to get bounced. This one will probably come down to the pen. As for Sunday night, Wang has pitched better, so we'll see if he can be had or not. The Mets best chance might come with Livan tomorrow, but their lineup, other than Sheffield, seems to be doing nothing against the Yanks.

bigjf said...

So I was wrong on that one. Burnett was terrific and Redding did pretty good before the lineup finally got to him.

Anonymous said...

Did anyone else listen to Richard Neer on the fan today?

Can anyone explain how Omar Minaya and the Mets let Mark DeRosa(the perfect fit) get away?

Is this a sign that the Mets have conceded the season only being 1 1/2 games out? Do we not know the full story on the severity of injuries?

Will Mike press the issue and ask the tough questions?

Stay tuned on Monday. LOL


bigjf said...

I would think the Mets were in on DeRosa but probably didn't have what the Indians were looking for.

Anonymous said...

Yeah Bigjf,

The radio chatter throughout the day was that the Mets did show some interest. Of course the Mets being the Mets did'nt pull the trigger or decided not to part with young talent in order to salvage a future that never comes.

I usually don't get too worked up over trades but this one was a no-brainer and I'm pissed that the Mets may have blown it.

Enjoy tonights game.


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Anonymous said...


AwesomeSean said...

Another brilliant Anon...

The jokes are for MJ being a pedophile, not for being black.

Are you Stephen A. Smith? He does have a lot of time on his hands now. That's a dig at his lack of a job, right now. Not his blackness.

UpstateJohn said...


Sorry for the delayed reaction but the better punchline is "One is white, plastic and dangerous for kids to play with and the other carries your food."

gabagool said...

Heres a WHITE guy who doesn't think for a minute MJ had anything to do with ANY molestation. But I think that because I READ and I RESEARCH.

You, ANON, on the other hand don't think he's guilty , just guessing here, because you happen to NOT be white. So it the color. That makes you a dumbfuck AND a racist MF.

Oh, and Jackson is WHITER than me. In EVERY fakkin way.

Its assholes like YOU that made MJ want to be white. Dick.

gabagool said...

Wait a minute.

That anon post is so fuckin stupid that its GOT to be a joke.

NO ONE could have been beaten so badly by his or her moms boyfriends to be so effen braindead.

bigjf said...

Why even dignify it by sinking to his/her level?

gabagool said...

Youre right if.

I've been listening to the fat one much to much. Thank you for the wake up call.

I should have just given anon the "wave".

Anonymous said...

hey gabagool you probably wanted to fuck mike. and black people cant be racist you clown. he wanted to be white because of this father.

and for all you white clowns he was innocent. you probably fuck your dogs and treat your dogs better than your kids. and im white not stephen a.

handwave that. dont sink to the levels of that anonymous.