62 WORD COUNT

I’ve just been informed by my peers here at the blog that I am on a strict 62 word count for this post. I have a lot to say about how last night’s Joba situation is going to be great for MMD today. Fuck, I’m already at 47 words through one real sentence. Shit, now I’m up to 58. Damn it, I am getting pulled before I can finish this post.

What do you think the reaction to Joba’s outing will be today on MMD?

Mike and Chris Breakdown Babe Ruth's called Shot

We capture the conversation mid segment on the FAN on October 2, 1932. Chris has digressed and doesn't think the Yankees should have ever taken Babe Ruth out of the rotation:

Chris: Now you want to say hold on now Chris, Babe is hitting a trillion home runs and the yankees are winning the world series and I understand but you have got a guy who is lights out. COME ON. No one could get a hit off the guy. He hits a home run, are they guaranteed to win? Are they guaranteed, mikey?

Mike: Guaranteed. I would say no.

Chris: Riiiight. When Ruth pitches its a guaranteed victory. Its like tommy our milk man who, rain or shine, milk right there first thing in the morning. There was that one storm when all the lights went out and my wife she's saying to me 'chris, no way we have milk in the morning.' And I said 'come on now. Tommy is guaranteed.' Wake up in the morning. Open the door. Milk is there. Its there mike.

Mike: That's a good job out of tommy

Chris: Good job... Its a TERRIFIC job. Guaranteed ruth is, just like tommy with the milk. You gotta start the guy.

Mike: now there are people who are saying that he called the homerun last night. That he pointed out and maybe said something

Chris: he said something, I didn't hear that.

Mike: This is just what I was told, that ruth pointed, which is not my cup of tea, some people like it, to me its not how you play the game but some people told me that he pointed and then said "The Babe is the Best."

Chris: He said that????

Mike: That's what I am told

Chris: the babe is the best? Oh my GOD, mike.. Mike, that is a terrible job. Babe take it easy will ya. The pointing, you wanna point before the home run ok. Mike doesn't like it, I'm not sure how I feel about it just yet, but 'The babe is the best'... Babe, take it easy. You are not even the best player in baseball. Let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Mike: he's pretty good

Chris: The babe is the best?? Maybe the best at eating hot dogs and some other stuff (russo cracks up laughing) say something funny mike..

Mike: eating and using his hot dog from what I hear

Chris: (on the floor hysterically laughing) VERY FUNNY MIKE

Mike: john minko has received morse code transmission of the scores around the league.. Take it away mr minko.

(Note: This post comes from Lt. Weinberg, who is out on the road, checking on the whereabouts of Tommy the milk man)

'Despite all your Negativity'

'Thank you for being in the business despite all your negativity' was one of the last lines from NBA Commissioner David Stern to Mike and the Mad Dog on the show today. In what was a highly contentious interview in which Stern used MMD's words against them to make them eat humble pie. The commish came prepared, like a lawyer setting up a trap for an unwitting defendant. Stern worked them over until they were thanking him for coming on and destroying them. The interesting dynamic is that when Russo gets embarrassed or humiliated, it's easier for him to laugh it off. But Mike is such a humorless, arrogant prick that he has a hard time being modest and contrite. The only thing that Stern got wrong was 'despite all your negativity'. David, if Mike and the Mad Dog didn't have negativity, they would have nothing.

MIKE'S GROCERY LIST

At 1:33PM today, Mike declared that it was time to hit the store: “The Yankees have to go shopping." Items on his grocery list include:

- Bronson Arroyo
- 2 cans of Tuna (Chicken of the Sea)
- A new Yankees bench
- 7 cases of Diet Soda
- Heath Bell ("You call San Diego about Heath Bell.")
- 2 boxes of Peanut Butter Zone Bars
- Or any other team’s closer (“Preferably a lefty if you can find one, but I’d even take someone’s closer and set him in the 8th inning)

Doesn’t seem like too big of a grocery list. I'm sure San Diego is itching to get rid of a guy who struck out 100 batters with a 2.00 ERA. What do you think?

Francesa VS Russo

So who is more important to the MMD show: Mike or Chris? State your case.

TOP TEN SIGNS IT'S A SLOW DAY FOR MMD

10. Fay Vincent gets an hour of the show

9. MMD talked about the National baseball scene in the first 25 minutes

8. Russo opened the show with “A disastrous weekend for Eddie Erickson, we’ll get to those details later.”

7. Those details turned out to be the shocking revelation that Eddie Erickson had a flood in his house this weekend.

6. A caller said he was happy that Dog was talking about tennis. That launched a discussion on tennis in which it was revealed that Ashley Harkleroad would be posing in Playboy. Dog said, 'She's pregnant. No, she had some surgery.'

5. MMD engaged in a Hall of Fame discussion (now don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with these segments, but before the All-Star break??)

4. There is a Euro 2008 call. Incredible day. Soccer! Chris claims to have remembered Greece upsetting Portugal in Euro 2004.

3. Mike and Chris have been talking the birth of free agency in baseball for several segments. Neither of them seem to know what they are talking about. The callers seem to know less.

2. With nothing left to discuss, Chris broke down Big Brown’s diet: “This is a horse folks who eats carrots, molasses and Oats.”

1. The show was so slow that even Mike couldn't take it anymore and left early at 4:05PM, leaving Dog to fend for himself for the final two-plus hours.

The Done Report

After mocking Tampa Bay and Toronto last week and repeatedly saying "Talk to me in August", Mike Francesa, just moments ago, issued his done report, on which teams' seasons were over (despite the fact that we are not yet in August):

Mike: Colorado, they're done and Seattle, I think they are both done. It's early to be doing that, but I don't think you'll see either one.

Chris: Pirates done? Washington done?

Mike: Well those teams were never started.

Chris:Kansas City done?

Mike: Yeah.

Chris: Baltimore done?

Mike: Baltimore done Yes. Kansas City done Yes.

Chris: Texas?

Mike: Yes.

Chris (Very surprised): Ohhh really!?

Mike: They're not going anywhere this year.

Chris: Cincinnati?

Mike: I won't count them out yet.

Chris: San Diego?

Mike: I won't count them out yet.

Chris: Giants?

Mike: Yeah. Giants are done.

Chris (big-time laugh): You hit the teams. I'm surprised you gave Texas a doner.

Mike: Yeah, I don't think they are any good.

Chris: So Seattle, Texas, Kansas City, the Orioles, the Nats, Pittsburgh, Colorado and the Giants.

These are actually some of my favorite Mike and Chris segments. What are your thoughts?